Month: October 2019

Being Lost Paid Off

In trying to figure out which way to go, being lost paid off.

When has being lost paid off for you? I have been needing to go walking for a long time, but have put it off for other higher priority activities. While I was out delivering a treat to a friend and looking for their place, I was unable to access their enclosed community without having their gate code. I parked at the complex’s main office and figured I could then walk to their place by going through the office. 

It was a tender mercy that as soon as I got out of my car, a gate nearby opened and I was able to enter by foot that way. I walked briskly to find their place as time was short before I needed to pick up my kids from school. Within a few minutes of thinking I was going the right way, my phone GPS was indicating I was going the wrong way. After rerouting me a number of times and finding that I was getting supposedly further and further away from my friend’s place, I turned around and did my best to follow the map as it guided me in a completely different direction which still didn’t seem to be getting me any closer to their place. At one point, I actually reached a dead end. 

In trying to figure out which way to go, someone spotted me and asked if I was lost and redirected me back over to where I had originally been before turning around. It just so happened that my friend’s place was only a few steps ahead from that location. Rather than looking for the number to their residence on the buildings themselves, I had focused and relied only on my navigation map app to get me to their place.

Though I could have been frustrated, instead it was a tender mercy that being lost and parking at the office was an opportunity for me to get in a nice, quick, fast-paced walk on a beautiful, cool and sunny day. Being lost paid off. I was super grateful for the much needed exercise that came about in the way it did.  

When have you relished in an opportunity to take care of yourself that inadvertently came about as a result of being lost, to which, being lost paid off?

tendermercym❤️ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

*If you would like to receive an email when new posts are published, please send your name and email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com.*

A Reminder Message Kicked Me In Gear

A most effective dental hygiene process was continued after a reminder message kicked me in gear.

When I really thought I was on top of the timing of my next semiannual routine dental cleaning appointment and it turned out I was not, it was a tender mercy a reminder message kicked me in gear to return to maintaining an effective brushing process I had let slip away momentarily out of pure laziness. 

Keeping track of routine appointments and staying on top of my health is important to me, however, when my battery-powered toothbrush stopped working and my semiannual dental appointment was assuredly still a few weeks away, I was not too concerned about the need to change out the old batteries for new ones lickety-split. 

Unfortunately, until I had received the reminder message, I had forgotten that at my last routine appointment earlier in the year, I had upped when I usually schedule for my second semiannual cleaning so that it not be over a holiday break as this year I wanted to leave the date open for the possibilities of what family gatherings may be happening during that timeframe. 

To maintain good dental hygiene, I have found that for me the most effective method, in addition to flossing, is using a spinbrush, a battery powered toothbrush with a spinning head. When at the point the batteries died, I continued to brush my teeth manually. I didn’t want to deal with the hassle and inconvenience of changing out the batteries.

Essentially though, it would have been a very simple and easy task of going into another room to get batteries, twist open the bottom portion of the spinbrush and place two new batteries in for the old ones. That’s it. I just didn’t want to take the time to do it. All the while I wanted to replace the batteries sooner rather than later as I do value and desire very much having healthy teeth, I thought I had enough leeway to put it off one more day and then another.

With my appointment coming up much sooner than I had recalled, there was no more time to delay. It was a tender mercy a reminder message kicked me in gear. I went into action mode and changed out the batteries immediately. 

When have you received a reminder message that kicked you in gear and helped you maintain what’s important to you—your health, etc? 

tendermercym❤️ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

*If you would like to receive an email when new posts are published, please send your name and email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com.*

My Doctor So Kindly Stayed Behind To See Me

My Doctor So Kindly Stayed Behind To See Me To Ensure A Pair Of Contact Lenses Fit Nicely In Place Of Needing Reading Glasses And Constantly Rotating Them Out With Sunglasses.

When I stopped into my eye doctor’s clinic late afternoon without an appointment to pick up a pair of special-order contact lenses, it was a tender mercy that though my optometrist was about to leave for the day, they so kindly stayed behind to see me and ensure the contacts were a good fit. 

Thus far, for me personally, I have embraced each approaching phase of aging with humor, adapting and adjusting to the changes as they occur. I often giggle with laughter and say, “here I am, I am here now” referring to that specific stage—white hair, etc, particularly this past year as I have reached the transition stage of now needing reading glasses. 

With having reading glasses comes the challenge of frequently alternating between wearing my sunglasses and reading glasses while out and about to occasionally not knowing which pair is on top of my head and putting on my reading glasses mistakingly instead of my sunglasses and vice versa. 

At a recent annual vision appointment, I considered switching out of wearing my current single vision contact lenses to either opt for monovision or multifocal contact lenses that would replace the need for reading glasses. Over the course of a couple of weeks, I tried both variations with different brands. During one of my return visits, a brand of lenses they did not have in stock was ordered.

It was shared with me that once the contacts arrived, I could pick them up without an appointment and if my optometrist was available on that day, they would see me, otherwise, I could take the contacts home, wear them and see how they fit, and schedule another followup visit a couple days later. 

Several days after I received the message that the contacts were in, I dropped by the clinic to pick them up and when I asked if my doctor was in, the front desk staff shared that they thought my optometrist may have already left for the day and unfortunately the next available opening to be seen by them wouldn’t be until the following week. Although I was told that another optometrist could see me and do a fitting check on the spot, I hesitated not wanting to get a new doctor up to speed on my current eye status and incur any additional financial charges after having already fully paid for consecutive visits tied to my annual visit so I declined. 

Right then, my optometrist’s assistant came out to the front desk and said they were ready for me. Though confused, I followed. I soon learned that my optometrist had still been in the office finishing up paperwork and when they became aware that I was there, it was a tender mercy my doctor so kindly stayed behind to see me beyond the time they had planned to leave for the day. 

When have you had a doctor go out of their way to help you and so kindly stayed behind to see you beyond the time they had planned to leave for the day? 

tendermercym❤️ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

*If you would like to receive an email when new posts are published, please send your name and email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com.*

The Importance Of Being Kind To Myself

A reflection on the importance of being kind to myself came one day as I noticed when some of my hair that draped in front of my shirt was in the shape of a heart.

The importance of being kind to myself came in a couple of different ways today. One being associated with maintaining my physical health and the other being associated with a shortcoming. 

While attending a Mindful Parenting class earlier in the day, I shared with those present my struggle with setting aside those things I become busy doing to stop and eat. Immediately, a mom sitting beside me handed me a KIND Granola Bar that she had with her in her purse. As I quickly scanned over the granola bar, I initially noted the nutritional value of the ingredients inside and was most excited about the nuts. I really like the health factor of nuts and the energy it provides. 

As the capitalization of the brand name of the granola bar also caught my eye and stood out to me, it was a tender mercy how the word KIND resonated and had a very profound meaning for me in that moment. It was a personal message to me of the importance of being kind to myself. I do things to take care of my intellectual, spiritual, mental, and emotional well-being but not to the same degree for my physical well-being, particularly taking time to eat. I enjoy food. I just prioritize other activities over eating and I don’t multitask both at the same time. It is a conscious effort I have to make to stop and eat. The tender mercy message reminded me to continue to be intentional in this area. 

This profound statement to be kind to myself helped me later in the evening too when I commented on a prompt I posted on my Tender Mercy Moments Facebook group and assumed at the time I sent it that it made sense, but later realized my response lacked clarity in effectively connecting to the prompt.

When I went back to the original post an hour or so after to add a tie in sentence, I was hoping and praying that my friends would return back to the message and reread the revised comment. Though I felt embarrassed for my faux pas, I giggled as I remembered to be kind to myself. It was a tender mercy I was able to accept my deficiency in writing and move forward without letting it set me back as well as trust that Heavenly Father would help in a way that whomever could benefit from my updated response would at some point read it. 

After the two occurrences, I went in search for an inspirational song that spoke to being kind to myself. Over and over again I found myself playing the song “Say Love” by Hilary Weeks. Though the lyrics are about sharing words of love and kindness to others, I recognized how valuable saying words of love and kindness to myself is when I get down on myself in those times I fall short and mess up. 

Another tender mercy moment of reflection on the importance of being kind to myself happened not that long ago while sitting in a parking lot after dropping off my kids at school and I noticed when I looked down in my lap for a moment that some of my hair that had fallen forward over the front of my shirt was in the shape of a heart. 

When have you been reminded in a profound way the importance of being kind to yourself? 

tendermercym❤️ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

*If you would like to receive an email when new posts are published, please send your name and email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com.*

On The Spot Parenting Turning Points

On The Spot, Parenting Turning Points Bring Harmony Back Into Family Life When It is Disrupted

Here and there, I’ve experienced various, different on the spot parenting turning points. Meaning, in the midst of having an aggravating parenting moment with my children, it has been a tender mercy when an ingenious idea, thought, story, analogy, phrase, etc. has come to my mind and when shared with my kids or input received from another is implemented, it has improved the immediate or recurring moment of discord.

Four of my most recent, individual, on the spot parenting turning points have been—First, when bringing up “hard” topics, my children are frequently pleading that I not lecture them. I feel it is important to talk about all kinds of important matters with my kids, but not sure exactly how to present it to hold their interest or for them to want to stay engaged in a discussion. Ironically, as I had been pondering to know the “how” to go about further addressing these topics in a way that is non lecturing, while listening to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints General Conference over the weekend, words I heard during a particular message by Hans T. Brown echoed my children’s plea.

Following that session, I shared with my family the thoughts that came up for me related to their request. It was a tender mercy that as we were all talking about it together, a light bulb went off and I asked my children, “What if I asked you, what do you know about such and such…pornography, sex, human trafficking, etc…and you then share with me your thoughts, feelings, or knowledge rather than my starting off the discussion with what I have heard and know?” Everyone was on board and agreed it would be a better approach, as well as prefacing the conversation with, “I would like to bring up a hard topic. What do you think about…such and such….?” 

Second, one late evening as our family gathered together to play a new board game recently purchased by one of our children who was excited to play with everyone as well as be in control of the way it was played, the manner and level of intensity in which they were introducing it and going through the rules was getting on everyone’s nerves to the point all family members no longer desired to stay, even though we all wanted to play.

Before we each got up to leave, it was a tender mercy an ingenious idea popped into my mind to set a timer to only play the game for 30 minutes and for every time they spoke with harshness and demanding authority, I would reduce the clock timer 1 minute. Though several minutes were lost, our experience altogether was much better.   

Third, on another occasion, when one of my children applied minimal effort to one of their chores and I encouraged that they give more, they felt hurt and perceived that I was saying their work was not good enough when in fact I was referring to the overall chore lacking full attention, not just the small area they quickly, in no time, cleaned up. The section they covered was great, yet there was more surface area untouched.

As they struggled with my ask and I was struggling to know how to effectively communicate my appreciation for what they had done to assure them I was sincere, in addition, wanting to see them further apply themselves on a larger scale, it was a tender mercy I recalled right then and there the “Story of The Five Dollar Lawn” I heard years ago depicting exactly my sentiments in a more clear and understandable way. 

As I shared this story with my child, it was received more or less as “food for thought”, at the same time it provided a clarity that, in essence, among a myriad of take aways, the outreach and level of work completed is quantifiable and each individual job by itself is recognized and valued with thanks and gratitude. 

Lastly, it was a tender mercy when listening to a specific episode of The Virtual Couch Podcast by Tony Overbay, the guest Ralphie Jacobs shared her top positive parenting tips, one being the phrase, “Try Again”. This phrase has been an on the spot, parenting turning point many a times. It has been super impactful as an antidote for when my children project blame onto another family member for their unwise choices or speak poorly to one another. 

When have you had those on the spot parenting turning points in which an ingenious idea, story, or phrase, etc. has come to you during an aggravating moment with your children helping you best respond to an immediate or recurring frustration? 

tendermercym❤️ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

*If you would like to receive an email when new posts are published, please send your name and email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com.*

Complimenting An Amazing Individual’s Prominent Disfigured Feature

Complimenting A Light Radiating From A Disfigured Prominent Feature.

A couple of days after one of my children placed on hold a few articles of clothing they really wanted to get at a particular store, I returned to buy them. While in line to checkout, I observed an employee whose obvious physical deformity stood out. As I waited my turn, I saw a light radiating from them and their contagious smile as they cheerfully assisted the customer before me. Suddenly, it was a tender mercy I felt impressed and prompted to compliment this amazing individual’s prominent disfigured feature even though doing so felt so uncomfortably awkward. 

I contemplated how I would approach them with the appropriate sensitivity. The impression was strong and I did not want to ignore it or pass it up as I knew how welcomed and valued compliments are when shared versus left unspoken.

I was the next patron up while they and one other employee were helping customers. I was hoping the other employee would finish with their customer’s transaction first so that I could express the compliment in passing and checkout with the other employee without identifying myself via my card payment. However, both customers checking out before me completed their purchases at the same time and as I stopped briefly to pay the quick compliment, the customer behind me walked up to the register I was preceding to go to. It was no mistake I was now at this employee’s register. 

With a warm smile and a tender heart, I simply shared, “ This may be strange, but I hope it doesn’t come across offensive, I like your nose”. It was a tender mercy they could feel of my genuine kindness and they glowed as they responded back, “thank you for the compliment” to which I happily followed up with a humble and resolute, “Absolutely!”

When have you felt prompted and impressed to compliment someone’s prominent disfigured feature as you observed in addition to their amazing personality, it being a remarkable light about them?

tendermercym❤️ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

*If you would like to receive an email when new posts are published, please send your name and email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com.*

A Twist On The Concept Of “It Is Never Enough”

A twist on the concept of “it is never enough” is that there is beauty all around in abundance.

What is a twist on the concept of “it is never enough”? Typically, this phrase, “it is never enough” has a negative connotation in reference to something being incomplete and insufficient. Lately, for me, “it is never enough” has meant not wanting those incremental things that manifest connection and compassion to ever go away. 

I just finished a blog post and felt really good about it. It resonated so well with how I was feeling and my experiences. It mirrored exactly what I was going through and described my situation perfectly. Surprisingly, spoken in words I couldn’t have said any better myself. I was wowed by how inspired I was as I read the words. Funny thing is, it was my very own experience spoken in my voice, however, it was a tender mercy it was articulated with the help of Heavenly Father as packaging my scattered and all over the place thoughts into concise words that a reader can understand is super hard for me.  

So, when a blog post (essentially my journal entries that not only are to bless my readers, they are mainly for me and I go back and reread them over and over again and am touched as I recall vividly each tender mercy moment as if in real time the profound experience all over again) comes together and speaks exactly in a clear way my thoughts and feelings, I am beyond impressed and grateful!  

Once done with each blog entry, considering the struggle and hardship writing is for me, I take a deep breath and say I did it. I then take a break for a bit, but I know the break is short lived and that tender mercy moments will continue and will never stop. They keep coming and coming, day after day after day. Like dishes and laundry, they never cease. The break is brief and then I am at it once again, writing and sharing my experiences for the purpose of being a light to others, including myself, to feel and know of Heavenly Father’s love personally and individually for me and you every day. 

One load of laundry finished or dishes washed and dried is seemingly never enough as it is a forever job. They are mundane, routine, and not always enjoyed, however, very much appreciated and valued when completed each and every time. It is a tender mercy that as painstakingly annoying and obnoxious it can be to never really have the daily essentials, eating healthy, exercising, caring for oneself and family member’s, etc. ever done, done, there is joy and gratitude and satisfaction that comes from doing them that keeps me plugging along. 

There are aspects of each I like even mixed with what I dislike or find hard to do. For me, recognizing daily tender mercy moments for the most part is easy. Writing them out is hard but so worth it to go back and reread them and have the memories preserved. I like the feel of the warm water flowing across my hands while washing dishes though the task of doing dishes, albeit essential, is not one I would otherwise pick up and do for fun per se. Being outdoors among nature is fun and enjoyable, however, walking up hills out of breath is tough. The accomplishment and reward of the hard coming together with the fun makes it so worth it. 

Our efforts each and every moment individually IS enough. It is never enough to stop receiving that which is good continuously. It is never enough for those tender mercy moments to cease from coming day after day. Heavenly Father’s mindfulness and awareness of me is something I never want to go away, stop, or cease. 

When have you viewed a twist on the concept of “it is never enough” in a positive light for want of things which are good to never go away, stop, or cease?

tendermercym❤️ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

*If you would like to receive an email when new posts are published, please send your name and email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com.*

A Lesser Quality Product Worked Also

A Lesser Quality Product Worked Also To Achieve The Desired Goal—Mailing An Important Document In A Somewhat See-Through Envelope That You Licked To Seal

Mailing a letter is no easy feat for me. The preparation process which includes my doubling checking, detail oriented procedures and then the drive to the post office more than 20 minutes away, depending on traffic, is a real effort that I am too lazy most often to do except for the shipping of Christmas and missionary packages to family members. Aside from that, I hardly ever mail letters. 

On this day, I needed to mail out an important document. In preparing to do so, I wanted to place it in a self-seal letter size envelope and then inside an 8 1/2 x 11 mailer that included automatic tracking. Not having any letter size envelopes on hand, I stopped by the store on the way to the post office to purchase them. As I looked at the pricing between the only two brands of same like envelopes, I selected the box that was the least expensive. 

As soon as I returned to my car, I took one envelope out of the box and noticed the texture was of lesser quality and a thinner material from those I’ve previously purchased. I was surprisingly ok with them although I prefer a higher quality non see-through envelope. It wasn’t until I arrived at the post office, I realized the envelope was even more so not what I had intended and may have been the reason for the price difference. Instead of being the removable self-adhesive seal envelopes I had wanted, I had disappointedly gotten the ones you have to lick to seal them which I thoroughly dislike. Yuck! 

I was frustrated I didn’t more thoroughly check to see if the envelopes were the right ones. I was so mad. I could have easily driven back to the store to exchange the box of envelopes, but I had consciously decided to not give in to my OCD product quality tendency. I opted instead to consider other resourceful ways I could utilize the envelopes in the future and make do with the lick and seal ones. Despite my disappointment, it was a tender mercy that I was mindful that those less than quality factors did not change the result of the mail getting to the addressee which was the ultimate desired goal. 

Considering my dislike for licking an envelope and not having tape on hand to seal it, it was another tender mercy I had wet wipes in my car console. Though they were not as efficient as tongue saliva, I was most definitely grateful for this available option. And, the fact the document was then going inside another envelope, I felt rest assured it would arrive sealed and secure. 

When have you wanted to use a preferred product you didn’t have on hand to complete a task and a lesser quality product you did have worked also in achieving your overall desired goal? 

tendermercym❤️ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

*If you would like to receive an email when new posts are published, please send your name and email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com.*