Category: Adjust

Letting Up On My Self-Induced Stringent Schedule

In letting up on my self-induced stringent schedule, I experienced a peace I did not know I would feel.

Over the last several months, normalcy of life has changed. Even so, as I stuck to my same ongoing rigid schedule by when I have wanted a very specific daily task completed, I began to feel constrained and limited from what more I could be doing during the day. A focus on this task set for the same time each evening weighed heavily on my mind until I realized it was not necessary to continue to keep that time fixed so tightly. In letting up on my self-induced stringent schedule, I experienced a peace I did not know I would feel.

This set schedule originated as a result of my many hours spent carpooling, running errands, and attending meetings throughout the day while my kids were at school and being unable to complete the task any sooner. Yet, wanting it completed before our family returned home from school and work, I designated a certain time that was the same each day in the early evening by when to have it done.

When the stay-at-home order due to COVID-19 went into effect and my kids began distance learning from home, even though my activities outside of the home decreased substantially and my day was now not as filled up in the same way, I continued to maintain the same designated time for to complete the specific daily task. In doing so, I began to feel a heaviness weighing on me over the course of the day as I was constantly thinking about this daily action item I still had left to do. It was a tender mercy I realized I was placing this enormous weight and strain on myself unnecessarily and putting off for later what I now had time to complete sooner. 

As I let up on my self-induced stringent schedule and took care of the task at whatever time it worked to do so rather than wait for the designated time set by me, it freed up my day tremendously. I have felt lighter, more joyful and productive with the openness of what more I have thus been able to do each day. 

This moment brought me back to 24 years ago and reflecting on a set schedule I had in regards to marriage. 

Due to my parent’s marriage ending in divorce while I was in college, I was not anxious to get married very quickly as statistically the odds increased of my marriage ending the same way. I set a parameter for myself, which made logic sense at the time, that I had to date a potential spouse for at least nine months before even considering marriage. I felt that would be adequate amount of time to really get to know someone. Because I did not want the same thing as divorce to happen in my marriage, I was on the lookout for very specific red flags while dating.  

Within the first month of my husband and I dating, I had a couple of spiritual experiences regarding marriage for which I pushed aside and ignored because my plan was not to marry someone I had not known well enough within the timeframe I concluded was ideal. When he proposed to me six weeks after we met, I then understood why I had received the spiritual experiences when I did. It was to prepare me for a different plan than what I had set for myself. In fact, hours before he proposed, he was standing behind me in my college apartment while I was nonchalantly flipping through the pages of a bridal magazine on the living room coffee table having no interest and desire of getting married anytime soon. 

Upon him asking me to marry him a few hours after that moment, I reflected on those spiritual experiences and I said yes. We were married 6 months to the date after we met. Although the length of time from our first meeting one another to courtship to proposal to marriage was short, I knew that the timing of our marriage was right. We have been married almost 24 years now and all throughout as the bumps and hardships have come and gone amidst scores of bliss, I have continued time and again to feel the same peace and know that the timing for us was right. 

When have you let up on a stringent schedule you set for yourself and you felt a peace in doing so as well as it opened up wonderful opportunities for you?

tendermercym❤️ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

*If you would like to receive an email when new posts are published which includes an audio version of the posts as well, please send your name and email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com.

Freedoms In The Midst Of Restrictions

Despite orders on a state and national level precluding certain activities from taking place for the time being due to the coronavirus pandemic, there have been many freedoms in the midst of restrictions to which I have enjoyed and valued very much.

For years, I have heeded the spiritual counsel given by modern-day prophets to prepare, alongside with my husband, for any number of potential catastrophic circumstances or devastating situations that may come our way. As such, although schools, churches, parks, and businesses have most recently closed temporarily due to the coronavirus pandemic, I have not felt any anxiety, stress, panic or fear. I have felt at ease. Despite orders on a state and national level precluding certain activities from taking place for the time being, there have been many freedoms in the midst of restrictions to which I have enjoyed and valued very much.   

~It has been a tender mercy that although state and local parks have closed, the nature preserve directly behind our house has been open, where our family has spent time outdoors many of days riding numerous bike trails and leisurely enjoying the walking paths, there and in our neighborhood as the spring temperatures and weather this year have both been ideal and beautiful. 

~Even with church buildings closed, it has been a tender mercy we have been able to continue to worship and have a Sacrament meeting in our home as a family each Sabbath Day.  

~In the wake of many products for weeks being hard to get because of the insufficient supply ratio to the sudden overwhelming demand for them, it has been a tender mercy that all of our essential needs have thus far been adequate due to our efforts to have consistently prepared ongoing for times like now long before the outbreak of the coronavirus.

~Before the stay-at-home order, when I frequented stores on a regular basis as I prefer in-store shopping, I would make frivolous and unnecessary purchases here and there to which the minimal costs for each item pulled together would add up quickly. For me, the money I have saved with “nonessential” businesses currently closed has been a tender mercy. 

~On days preceding the stay-at-home order when family members went off to school and work and the house was very quiet, I wanted to be out and about constantly. With our home now filled with family togetherness 24/7, it has been a tender mercy I have surprisingly not become stir crazy and had the itch to get out of the house. 

~Also, during this timeframe of enclosure, I’ve learned I am more so an introvert than I had ever thought myself of being and it is a tender mercy how content I have been days on end without being phased and feeling any disruption to my core being.

~In addition, it has been a tender mercy that for the first time ever I have not been constantly on the go. The stay-at-home order has opened up a lot of time for me to relax and enjoy so many of my at-home hobbies and the treasured opportunity to spend priceless quality time together as a family.  

When have you treasured the many freedoms in the midst of restrictions that were present for you during times like these? And, what have been those freedoms in the midst of restrictions that you have valued during these times?

tendermercym❤️ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

*If you would like to receive an email when new posts are published, please send your name and email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com.

It Was Tasty Nonetheless

Although the consistency of the fudge did not turn right, it was tasty nonetheless.

When the consistency of my first batch of homemade fudge this holiday season did not turn out right, it was a tender mercy an idea to add the overcooked fudge to a hot chocolate beverage came to mind. Although the fudge was dry and crumbly, it was still tasty nonetheless especially when added to the heated drink as it enhanced the richness and yumminess of the hot chocolate. 

It was a tradition in my home growing up to make fudge during the holidays and it had been years since I last made it. For whatever reason, the nostalgia perhaps, I decided to make it once again this year. The recipe I used from an inside label of a can of evaporated milk seemed simple and easy enough, which it was, other than the fact that I overcooked it even though I stirred it for no more than the 5 minute boil time indicated per the recipe instructions. 

Not wanting to waste and throw out the remaining evaporated milk, I went on to make a second batch and decreased the boil time by 1 minute. This batch came out better, yet being concerned it would set too fast while stirring in the final ingredients after removing it from the heat, I did not allow the marshmallows to fully melt before quickly scooping the fudge out of the stove top saucepan into a dish. Even so, this batch also was tasty nonetheless. 

On to batch #3 only because I still had remaining evaporated milk that I wanted to use up completely. There was just enough to make another half a batch. This time I only boiled the fudge for 2 minutes since I was making less fudge in the same saucepan as washed and reused the prior 2 times and it too came out dry and crumbly, yet, as with batch #1 and #2, it was likewise tasty. 

Despite my inability to make fudge that looked good, it was a tender mercy each varied batch was edible and tasty and the idea to add the dry and crumbly fudge to a hot chocolate beverage came to mind.

When have you made a dessert that did not turn out right, yet not all was lost as you realized before dumping the entire messed up batch that it was tasty nonetheless and could be added to enhance another fabulous treat? 

tendermercym❤️ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

*If you would like to receive an email when new posts are published, please send your name and email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com.*

My Doctor So Kindly Stayed Behind To See Me

My Doctor So Kindly Stayed Behind To See Me To Ensure A Pair Of Contact Lenses Fit Nicely In Place Of Needing Reading Glasses And Constantly Rotating Them Out With Sunglasses.

When I stopped into my eye doctor’s clinic late afternoon without an appointment to pick up a pair of special-order contact lenses, it was a tender mercy that though my optometrist was about to leave for the day, they so kindly stayed behind to see me and ensure the contacts were a good fit. 

Thus far, for me personally, I have embraced each approaching phase of aging with humor, adapting and adjusting to the changes as they occur. I often giggle with laughter and say, “here I am, I am here now” referring to that specific stage—white hair, etc, particularly this past year as I have reached the transition stage of now needing reading glasses. 

With having reading glasses comes the challenge of frequently alternating between wearing my sunglasses and reading glasses while out and about to occasionally not knowing which pair is on top of my head and putting on my reading glasses mistakingly instead of my sunglasses and vice versa. 

At a recent annual vision appointment, I considered switching out of wearing my current single vision contact lenses to either opt for monovision or multifocal contact lenses that would replace the need for reading glasses. Over the course of a couple of weeks, I tried both variations with different brands. During one of my return visits, a brand of lenses they did not have in stock was ordered.

It was shared with me that once the contacts arrived, I could pick them up without an appointment and if my optometrist was available on that day, they would see me, otherwise, I could take the contacts home, wear them and see how they fit, and schedule another followup visit a couple days later. 

Several days after I received the message that the contacts were in, I dropped by the clinic to pick them up and when I asked if my doctor was in, the front desk staff shared that they thought my optometrist may have already left for the day and unfortunately the next available opening to be seen by them wouldn’t be until the following week. Although I was told that another optometrist could see me and do a fitting check on the spot, I hesitated not wanting to get a new doctor up to speed on my current eye status and incur any additional financial charges after having already fully paid for consecutive visits tied to my annual visit so I declined. 

Right then, my optometrist’s assistant came out to the front desk and said they were ready for me. Though confused, I followed. I soon learned that my optometrist had still been in the office finishing up paperwork and when they became aware that I was there, it was a tender mercy my doctor so kindly stayed behind to see me beyond the time they had planned to leave for the day. 

When have you had a doctor go out of their way to help you and so kindly stayed behind to see you beyond the time they had planned to leave for the day? 

tendermercym❤️ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

*If you would like to receive an email when new posts are published, please send your name and email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com.*

A Lesser Quality Product Worked Also

A Lesser Quality Product Worked Also To Achieve The Desired Goal—Mailing An Important Document In A Somewhat See-Through Envelope That You Licked To Seal

Mailing a letter is no easy feat for me. The preparation process which includes my doubling checking, detail oriented procedures and then the drive to the post office more than 20 minutes away, depending on traffic, is a real effort that I am too lazy most often to do except for the shipping of Christmas and missionary packages to family members. Aside from that, I hardly ever mail letters. 

On this day, I needed to mail out an important document. In preparing to do so, I wanted to place it in a self-seal letter size envelope and then inside an 8 1/2 x 11 mailer that included automatic tracking. Not having any letter size envelopes on hand, I stopped by the store on the way to the post office to purchase them. As I looked at the pricing between the only two brands of same like envelopes, I selected the box that was the least expensive. 

As soon as I returned to my car, I took one envelope out of the box and noticed the texture was of lesser quality and a thinner material from those I’ve previously purchased. I was surprisingly ok with them although I prefer a higher quality non see-through envelope. It wasn’t until I arrived at the post office, I realized the envelope was even more so not what I had intended and may have been the reason for the price difference. Instead of being the removable self-adhesive seal envelopes I had wanted, I had disappointedly gotten the ones you have to lick to seal them which I thoroughly dislike. Yuck! 

I was frustrated I didn’t more thoroughly check to see if the envelopes were the right ones. I was so mad. I could have easily driven back to the store to exchange the box of envelopes, but I had consciously decided to not give in to my OCD product quality tendency. I opted instead to consider other resourceful ways I could utilize the envelopes in the future and make do with the lick and seal ones. Despite my disappointment, it was a tender mercy that I was mindful that those less than quality factors did not change the result of the mail getting to the addressee which was the ultimate desired goal. 

Considering my dislike for licking an envelope and not having tape on hand to seal it, it was another tender mercy I had wet wipes in my car console. Though they were not as efficient as tongue saliva, I was most definitely grateful for this available option. And, the fact the document was then going inside another envelope, I felt rest assured it would arrive sealed and secure. 

When have you wanted to use a preferred product you didn’t have on hand to complete a task and a lesser quality product you did have worked also in achieving your overall desired goal? 

tendermercym❤️ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

*If you would like to receive an email when new posts are published, please send your name and email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com.*

Stayed Out Of Harm’s Way

Stayed out of harm’s way when tailgated on a narrow, windy, scenic backroad.

While in route to take my children to school via a scenic path to avoid the morning rush hour congestion along a more direct thoroughfare, I became concerned when after turning onto this windy stretch of road, one lane each way, I observed through my rearview mirror a truck following behind me awfully close, uncomfortably close. Not wanting to get hit, I intentionally maneuvered and adjusted my position to stay out of harm’s way so as not to be directly in front of them, but off center, keeping left near the lane divider line to stay as far clear of them as possible. 

With each frequent stop-and-go for a few miles on this curvy, up and down road that was backed up as well, I was extremely nervous as they tailgated me. I was on high alert, extra cognizant, and continuously aware of the driver’s movements. I considered pulling into someone’s driveway or a neighborhood entrance to let them go ahead of me, but worried how long it would take before another driver would let me back in the line of traffic and the possibility of it delaying my kids getting to school on time. As I continually kept an eye on the truck behind me, I prayed that at the four-way stop some minutes ahead, a different driver would fall behind me, separating me from the driver “riding my bumper”. 

Once at the four-way stop, it was a tender mercy that while I continued to go straight, the driver behind me turned left. 

When has a driver tailgated you while on a windy, narrow road and where it was not easy or convenient to pull over for them to get around you, you were able to stay out of harm’s way and relieved when at a traffic stop the driver split off in a different direction and was no longer right behind you?

tendermercym❤️ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

*If you would like to receive an email when new posts are published, please send your name and email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com.*

Joyful Moments Among The Chaos

A park is a place where one can observe joyful moments among the chaos of children running here and there.

I love teaching my young, energetic, and active Primary class at church. They definitely “keep me on my toes”. Some Sundays are more chaotic than others, yet, oh how my hearts swells and is filled with such joy being able to serve currently in the capacity and calling as their primary teacher. I am awed and fascinated by what all I gain from them and walk away with each week as they willingly help and participate in our class. Through countless tender mercies I have seen and received as a teacher, I have experienced many joyful moments among the chaos.

One that surprised me and I was delighted by was a week when the children were very talkative with each other and seemed disengaged while I struggled to efficiently and effectively articulate and communicate a particular principle and though I don’t know how well they understood any of what I shared, all 8 of the kids present on that day remained in their seats the whole time. Not one got up and ran around. That, to me, was an amazing tender mercy. 

Most recently, as I began a lesson soon after we entered our classroom together and everyone had quickly sat in a chair, one member of our class sat in the “teacher’s chair”.  I was super enthusiastic when I asked if they would be teaching our class that day to which they initially said yes and then declined, however, they gladly accepted the invitation to assist me. 

As they did so, being silly, they presented the material I had given them to share with everyone else in an opposite manner than what I had asked of them. Nonetheless, immediately, I took to their “out of the box” approach and saw that their method was totally awesome and I welcomed and encouraged them to continue. It was a tender mercy that their actions actually enhanced the presentation of the lesson, albeit different than how I had planned, yet, in a very cool interactive way. 

Shortly after this occurrence, as I continued the lesson with an inspired, impromptu, straightforward and simple object lesson, my presentation threw off one of the students and they were upset. As I squatted down to be on their level and lovingly asked about their thoughts and why they were so upset, I was enlightened as they expressed the reason they became distraught. It was a tender mercy I was able to see where they were coming from and communicate with them in a way that cleared up their concern and soothed and calmed them down. I have been edified time and time again as the kids in my class have candidly shared their remarkable perspectives and insights with me. 

Although I come to class well prepared, I never know exactly how the lesson or class time will go as the dynamics and energy level of each child varies weekly. As I continuously pray to Heavenly Father before and during class to help me teach His children in His way, I am ready to adapt and “go with the flow”. Even though class time can be hectic and crazy, I have received guidance and direction through one tender mercy after another and I have been able to experience joyful moments among the chaos. 

When have you experienced joyful moments among the chaos while teaching very active children and through their ups and downs you gained remarkable insights and valuable lessons from them?

tendermercym❤️ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

*If you would like to receive an email when new posts are published, please send your name and email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com.*

Having A Backup Option In Case

I was really happy when getting dressed for the day that I came across a blouse I especially liked and had forgotten about until I saw it when sorting through my clothes. When I got oil-free makeup remover on the shirt shortly before leaving the house for church, I was concerned, though not for long. It was a tender mercy I had another dressy top and cardigan I could quickly swap out that went well with my skirt without needing to change my entire outfit. 

Before exchanging my blouse, I wanted to try and get what looked like the “grease stain” out while it was still wet. I dabbed the spot with water and even though I had a limited amount of time, I let it air dry. I was worried that if I blow-dried it, the supposed stain would set in. It was another tender mercy the blouse dried very quickly. Once it air dried completely, the spot was still slightly visible so I dabbed it with water again and after it dried the second time around, I did not notice it. If it was still present, my hair was long enough to cover it up. 

Not only was it a tender mercy I had a backup top and cardigan to wear if necessary, in addition, the spot on the blouse cleaned up nicely and particularly fast. 

When have you been concerned when an article of clothing became what appeared stained just minutes before needing to be someplace on time and not only did you have a replacement you could quickly change into if necessary, even better, after dabbing the area with water, the “grease spot” cleared up?

tendermercym❤️ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

*If you would like to receive an email when new posts are published, please send your name and email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com.*

Driving Error

On a heavily pouring rain, wipers full speed, gray and hazy morning while taking one of my children to school, visibility was off and on limited along the way. As such, although I had driven the same path almost daily for months, I realized, after the fact, that I had taken the wrong exit. Upon making a left-hand turn under a bridge with my turn signal blinking, I found myself in a nonofficial outside turn lane needing to merge immediately into the one and only turn lane. I had supposed the lane I was in also turned left and was unaware it did not until I made the turn. It was a tender mercy that when I recognized my error, the vehicle in the proper turn lane was a car length behind me and I was able to swiftly merge in safely.

When has your ability to see while driving been skewed temporarily and upon realizing you were navigating off course, you were able to recorrect safely?

tendermercym❤️ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

*If you would like to receive an email when new posts are published, please send your name and email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com.*

Adjustable Pre-Purchased Park Tickets

Over Spring Break, our family traveled out-of-town to visit several theme parks. During the week, Monday through Friday, we had pre-purchased tickets to a different park each day leaving the weekend for one day to drive back home and, before our kids returned to school, another day to recoup our exhausted energy after many long days of nonstop fun. 

Our days were packed full from sunrise to sunset. After 2 solid days of walking a lot and standing in lines, tiredness and sore feet set in and an unexpected occurrence derailed our plans for Wednesday. It was a tender mercy we had the flexibility to extend our trip one more day and fit in a day to relax midweek. The much needed break was essential allowing us to rest, leisurely prepare lunches and snacks for the latter half of the week, take it easy and enjoy a slow-paced day of napping, reading, and pool time. It was also a tender mercy that our purchased park tickets were able to be altered and switched to another day and the rearrangement at the end of the week did not set us back any to get home in time when school started back up.    

When have you experienced a change in your travel plans and you had the flexibility to extend your trip an additional day(s) and a pre-purchased ticket for something planned on the day that was derailed was able to be altered and changed for another day within the timeframe of your vacation?

tendermercym❤️ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

*If you would like to receive an email when new posts are published, please send your name and email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com.*