Category: Love

Not All Was Lost

My husband and I were desirous and looking forward to attending the homecomings of two returned missionaries. They were the first of our son’s (himself being almost 3/4 of the way through his mission) group of friends to return home after serving a two year mission for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and we were awaiting word as to when they would be taking place in their respective home wards. Time got away and I heard nothing until one day while in dialogue with a friend at church, I learned that they had already happened. I was bummed to hear the news that we had missed their homecoming talks.

Later that same afternoon, our family was attending a meeting at church. As we were preparing to exit the building, I looked down the hall and I saw one of our son’s friends in the foyer. It was a joyous reunion! As I was talking to him, the other returned missionary came out of the chapel. And shortly thereafter another one of our son’s friends also came out of the chapel into the foyer. Being able to talk to and see these two returned missionaries and the other friend of our son’s was an incredible experience!

When hours earlier I was sad that I had missed their homecomings, it was a tender mercy that here they both were in our building and we crossed paths and saw each other at that very moment in the foyer as we were preparing to leave the building and they were entering their meeting that was about to begin. It was awesome!

When have you been disappointed that you missed a missionary homecoming, a friend or loved one’s birthday party, baby shower, graduation, wedding, etc. and the circumstances and timing of crossing paths with them later was remarkable, replacing the sadness of wanting to have attended their special occasion to the joy that not all was lost and you were now seeing and spending one-on-one time with them?

tendermercym♥ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

*If you would like to receive an email when new posts are published, please send your name and email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com.*

Past Mistakes

While at a college presentation recently, I was remembering some of my experiences that I had many years ago when I was a college student. Periodically, there is one experience that pops back up over and over, here and there, and eats at me. I made a decision that I have questioned and have wondered if I could go back, would I have done what I did differently. I don’t know? I don’t know if I did the right thing or if I did the wrong thing, but it is something that I have felt guilty about all these years since and I haven’t been able to fully put it behind me.

During the middle of the presentation, I received a message on my phone from a friend I’ve known since childhood, but had not had direct correspondence with in years. As the struggle was taking place in my mind and I glanced down to see my friend’s kind message come through, I was taken back to a specific memory I had with this friend several years back. I opened up to them about a choice I had made that I had not resolved and it had bothered me for over 20 years until I got it off my chest apologizing to my friend for my actions.

My friend warmly received me. As I finally put my wrong to rest, I felt a weight removed. Even after the wrong I had done, this friend still loved and cared about me and saw past my error and saw the person I am truly. I was not my mistake. I am a good person, imperfect, mortal, and am learning and growing like everyone else and I do mess up. In a quick, split second as I glanced at the message and in remembrance of that experience, I heard the words, “Stop being so hard on yourself”.

On my drive home, I pondered on what had just occurred as I kept questioning my long ago decision as a college student. Each time the experience had came up, I continued to feel sorrow and pain. This time was no different. I had been tucking away the pain, setting it aside, ashamed, disappointed, uncertain if I had adequately dealt with it earlier, struggled to forgive myself, and not sure what to do to rid it fully from gnawing at me.

As I reached out to Heavenly Father in prayer on my way home, I thought about my knowledge of the Atonement. I knew I couldn’t change the past, but I could learn from the past to not make the mistake again in the present or the future. I knew Heavenly Father wanted me to be happy moving forward. As I was dialoguing with Heavenly Father, the words “embrace it” came very clearly and distinctly. In that instance, I felt a peace. I sought confirmation of this response. And again, I felt peace. My pain and suffering washed away. All these years later as I have avoided the benefits my choice could have had because I questioned if my actions were right or not, I heard, “embrace it, use what you have done for your good”. In addition to feeling peace, I also felt an excitement.

I responded back, replying to Heavenly Father, “ok, I will embrace it”. I felt joy. My pain had stayed with me long enough and it was a tender mercy both messages I received, “Stop being so hard on yourself” and “Embrace it”, allowed me to release the pain I was holding on to and experience joy.

When have you hung on to a mistake you made long ago and after praying and hearing specific words given to you from a loving Heavenly Father, you were finally able to let it go?

tendermercym♥ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

Brownies

Labor Day was rainy. Midway through the day, I was craving brownies and looked in our pantry for a brownie mix and we had none. Several hours later when there was a temporary break from the rain, my husband went to the store to get some groceries. When he returned home and I was putting the food away, I noticed the pre-made brownies he had purchased. I was ecstatic! He had no idea that earlier in the day I was wanting brownies. I had not told anyone. I thanked him multiple times. I was so happy.

When have you said nothing to anyone when you craved something you did not have and shortly thereafter you were brought that very treat?

tendermercym♥ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

Be Still

As our kids returned to school after summer break, I knew I would have “mom homework” the first few days. In addition to completing the necessary paperwork for each of them, I had a lot of other worries, concerns, and questions weighing on my mind. During this time, I set aside what I would normally do each day that was spiritually uplifting for me. By midweek, I felt drained. I decided it was a good idea to take a break to find and listen to an inspiring message that would give me a much needed boost.

As I scrolled through a couple weeks of inspirational messages on Hi Five Live, there was one message that stood out to me, however, I was not drawn to it. I skipped over it a number of times, yet felt I should go back and listen to it. Eventually I did. In the message, I remember nothing of what was shared other than the words, “you need to go to the temple” enter my mind. That day came and went. Then the next day came, and into the evening I was reminded that I needed to go to the temple. I made the decision and mentally prepared that night that I would go the next day.

Bright and early, following family prayer, I looked at the temple schedule on our fridge and noticed the temple was not open in the morning during the timeframe I had intended to go. I changed my plans and decided I would do family history work instead to further seek to find something about my husband’s great grandfather several grandfather’s back. I then went on my way to taking my kids to school.

As I pulled into my driveway upon returning home, I received the impression again that I needed to go to the temple. Immediately, I remembered the Bishop of our congregation of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints share a couple weeks earlier that more sessions for temple ordinance work had opened up. Right away, while still sitting in my car, I called the temple. I was not the least bit surprised that someone picked up. Although it was last minute, I was able to attend the final Endowment session of the morning. Throughout the session, I listened and waited for a powerful answer I was anticipating I’d receive from Heavenly Father. As I finished the ordinance and I sat in the Celestial room knowing I was to be in the temple, on that day, at that time, I continued to wait. As time passed and patrons began leaving, the room became quiet and still. It was through the quietness and stillness of the room that the message I needed to hear became known. It was, “Be Still”.

As I shared the details of my experience to my husband, he mentioned a phrase I’ve heard many times, “Be Still And Know That I Am God”. The words impacted me tremendously. This answer was applicable to every worry, concern, and question I had. Heavenly Father knew what I needed. I am grateful for the knowledge I have that He is aware of me and loves me and through a number of invitations, I was blessed as Heavenly Father lead and guided me to the temple, a place of peace, to hear the words, “Be Still”.

When have you been guided and led to a place where you have received an answer(s) to questions, concerns, and worries on your mind?

tendermercym♥ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

To receive an email when new posts are published, please send your email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com

Timing Was Perfect

One evening as I was preheating the oven to begin dinner, my husband called and shared that he expected it was going to be a late night at work. I changed up the meal plan for our kids and I and held off preparing it until later. As the food finished cooking, my husband came through the door, arriving home earlier than either of us had anticipated. We were both very happy! The timing was perfect.

Then the next day, I was out all morning into the early afternoon and prior to picking up our kids from school, I stopped at a new restaurant that I had wanted to check out, most particularly because I had a coupon for BOGO Free burrito that was ending that day.  While watching the burritos being made, my husband called and asked if I was interested in joining him for a late lunch. I had a big smile on my face and said absolutely! The timing was ideal. I had lunch for him and for me and we were able to enjoy time together! So awesome!

When have you been overjoyed when a loved one or friend showed up at the perfect time to join you for a meal?

tendermercym♥ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

Brotherly Kindness

On a very hot and sunny afternoon, our youngest son invited one of our other sons to go on a bike ride with him in our neighborhood and to spend some time together at our community park.

As they were preparing to leave, I was reviewing safety precautions with the boys, and the older brother said, “don’t worry mom, I’ll watch him.” My heart melted with the softness at which he spoke those words and his willingness to care for his younger brother.

Once outside while getting their bikes ready, the younger brother noticed his handle bars were crooked and the older brother happily went over to his bike, adjusted the handle bars and straightened them out. Both boys were cheerful and genuinely excited to spend some time together.

The younger one was happy his older brother accepted his invitation to go for a bike ride to the park and for fixing his bike and the older brother was happy to join him and to help him out. My heart was full. Watching our boys working together, getting along, and showing forth brotherly kindness to one another was a tender mercy.

When has your heart been full observing your children working together, getting along, and showing forth kindness to one another?

tendermercym♥ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

*If you would like to receive an email when new posts are published, please send your name and email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com.*

A Healthy Distraction

Two of our children had plans to go to the movies, just the two of them for the first time together. I was particularly concerned about the younger one staying with the older one and maintaining the buddy system.

I am a natural worrier. I recognized my concern was more fear-based rather than trusting and having faith in the older one to watch over and care for the younger one in the same way I am vigilant of the safety and well-being of each of our children. The night before, the “what ifs” crossed my mind and by the next morning I felt all would be ok because I changed what I was telling myself.

Safety measures were discussed with each child and a protocol for a Plan A and Plan B were acknowledged in the event that they were separated. I knew it was important for them to have this bonding time together and allowing them to go would create cherished memories they will always have and share with one another.

My husband and I have taught our children how to make right decisions, to be wise in their choices, to be alert, attentive, and mindful of their surroundings; and they have learned tools that will help them when they find themselves stuck. It is important that I let them go and allow them to grow, particularly, when there is nothing stopping or blocking their personal development except my own worries for them when not based on anything other than fear. It was not an impression or prompting to say no. It was me and when I got past that and saw what good would come from the opportunity, I was ok.

To that, we said a prayer together, I said I Love You, I watched them leave and then I preoccupied my time with things that I enjoy so as to not consume myself with worry. I am grateful that I felt ok about it enough to say yes and I recognized it was my own fear that could’ve held them back.

When have you been worried about your children and you preoccupied your mind and your time with things that you loved and enjoyed to distract yourself from those concerns and it helped to more quickly pass the time away until you were reunited again?

tendermercym♥ments~jld

A Child’s Whereabouts

It is summertime and it can be a challenge for my kids when they seem to have run out of ideas on what to do with their time and they resort to sedentary activities such as TV, computer time, and mobile phones. In our home, we have a limit on how long and when devices can be used during the day and a curfew for when all devices are turned in for the night.

During the summer, mornings are slow for us. We are night owls, not morning folk. I knew one of my kids has been looking forward to finishing the last few episodes of a favorite TV series and due to a time limit the prior day, they were not able to complete the remaining shows when they had wanted. This morning, I had an impression that this child was up watching TV prior to other family members getting up.  Although, I was aware that earlier they had completed a weekly chore of taking the trash to the street and thanked them, I was not happy to see them watching TV at the crack of dawn prior to other more productive activities I would like them doing, beyond the one chore, before screen time.

I asked them to turn it off and ponder ways they could be more active and redirected them to consider how they could better utilize their time before watching TV. Without any further dialogue and to remove myself from a debate I felt was coming, I stepped away to give them time to think about it for themselves.  It also gave me time to ask myself a similar question, “what could they do actively in the house when it is over a 100 degrees outside?” A couple of thoughts that came to mind was baking cookies and playing table tennis if the A/C or a fan is on. What are some things your kids have come up with or you have suggested they do?

I get the importance of down time—an appropriate and reasonable amount—to rejuvenate after a long hard day and the need to rest and relax if outdoors in the heat.   We are halfway through the summer and I feel that there has been a large amount of down time the last couple of weeks. They have enjoyed plenty of screen time, educational and entertaining, and when they have spent lots of time in this way sitting on the couch, it has adversely affected their behavior and mood. Although they have also been reading, playing the piano, and engaging in a hobby, it is more sitting.

I encourage my kids to be balanced in their activities and to break up their day with a variety of things they can do including first completing their chores. When a child starts complaining of body aches from sitting too long, I invite them to be productive and engaged in more active ways and ask them to consider what they can do to be up and moving between those times they spend sitting down. Often times, they choose to go outside and play basketball, ride bikes or jump on the trampoline. Knowing what to do inside that is active when it is hot, hot, hot outside is much harder.

What have you done when you have faced a similar summer experience with your kids?

When have you had an experience you were prompted to check on one of your children?

tendermercym♥ments~jld

Heartfelt Emojis


There was a moment in the day that it entered my mind to send a love emoji to my husband and so I did. I noticed that minutes prior, he texted me love emojis. Somehow I had missed his when they came through, however, I thought it was neat that within that same approximate time frame not only was he thinking about me, but I likewise, was thinking about him.

When have you had experiences and moments where within a small window of time almost simultaneously, if not simultaneously, you were thinking of someone you love and likewise they were thinking of you?

tendermercym♥ments~jld

 

Self-Sufficient Kids

Observing and watching my kids accomplish various tasks on their own is such a joy. As we arrived at a bowling alley per the request of one of our children, there was nothing I needed to do as a mom other than ask for a specific lane we wanted and pay for the shoes and the game for each family member.

Each child picked up their own shoes and bowling ball and our youngest set up everyone’s name on the screen.  My husband and I sat back and enjoyed bowling and watching our children play.  It was wonderful spending quality time together.

It is quite exciting for me as a mom to be in a place where my kids are capable and able to do so much themselves. It’s a fun stage as they are proactive, independent, self-sufficient, and take initiative.  Individually, we are all very competitive when it comes to playing games and that has helped us separately improve are skills, in this case—bowling, and as a family, support and compliment one another (win or lose) and build stronger bonds with each another.

Shortly after we began playing, our two youngest boys went together to seek a different bowling ball better suited for our younger one.  It was neat seeing them work together as well as watching our daughter and middle son having fun interacting and taking pictures together.

What are you enjoying and appreciating with your children right now in the phase you and your family are currently?

tendermercym♥ments~jld