Category: Family

Come To Know The Why

With my intense anxiety on slick roads, being in a solid, secure vehicle with suitable tire traction for the projected conditions was a singular, come to know the why moment, a reason, if you will, our car randomly stopped working. 

Have you ever asked yourself these questions, silently or out loud, “Why do bad things happen to good people?! Why did this happen to me?! Why did this happen for me?!” Though the answers may remain a floating question, without an answer and elusive at times, other times you may, to a degree, come to know the why, the reason for the reason. One such time for me came the weekend of my dad’s unexpected passing. 

Each morning, after I drop off my youngest at school, I will back into a parking spot until about 15 minutes beyond the school start time, as vehicles coming and going can get pretty congested and crazy, which in turn spikes and intensifies my anxiety. While I wait out the time for a bit, I’ll turn off the car to conserve gas and either attend to various tasks on my phone, read a physical book, or listen to a podcast. 

On this particular Thursday morning, upon ready to head back home, as I turned on the car, it would not start. A slew of flashing lights appeared on the dashboard. Not only that, it was as if the car lost its grounding and was slipping away. It felt like the car was moving forward. Even with my foot on the brake pedal, I was concerned about the car rolling into the parked car in front of me, so I applied the emergency brake as well, which seemed to do nothing at all. 

Not knowing what was going on, I straightaway pulled out the dealership manual from the glove box to figure it out, and still, with no idea how to solve for what was going on, I reached out to my husband who came to my assistance. We ended up leaving the car in the school parking lot. Once home, I called the dealership and learned it was likely the battery. My husband returned to the school and jumpstarted the car, alone a tender mercy I had backed into the parking spot, and the car then sat in our garage, undriveable for several days before the proper installation of a new battery could take place. In the meantime, it was a tender mercy we had a backup vehicle to drive, a truck in particular.  

The next evening as my husband and I had just finished a dinner date, I received a text from one of my siblings that I was processing as we were leaving the restaurant. I wasn’t sure what to make of the message, if it was for real or not. We did not travel far before I elected we stop and pull into a gas station and I shared with my husband the message, “not sure if dad will make it through the night”. The validity of the message left me up in the air as to what to do. Though uncertain, as I had no preliminary knowledge of my dad being physically unwell, I decided it would be better to go see him than not. 

It was a tender mercy not only that the gas station we had stopped at was right next to the interstate that traveled directly up to my dad’s residence, but also that we were in the truck the evening of the first winter storm advisory of the season. With my intense anxiety on slick roads, being in a solid, secure vehicle with suitable tire traction for the projected conditions was a singular, come to know the why moment, a reason, if you will, our car randomly stopped working. 

Upon reaching my dad and visiting with him and getting updates from my siblings, I learned that one and half weeks earlier, my dad was vibrant, vivacious, and energetic, and it was shared that he could live another 20 years. And then, just like that, over a one week span, his bill of health declined. Though his physical appearance looked frail, he was coherent in conversation and mentally cognizant of his surroundings. As the evening hour waned and my dad expressed desire to rest, my optimistic self believed he would make a full recovery, which carried me through the night as my husband and I returned back to our home. 

The next morning I received a call from a sibling that had stayed with my dad through the night and attended to his care. As he observed my dad’s suffering in the early morning hours, before daybreak he took him to a hospital emergency room, upon where my dad passed the moment he was wheel-chaired inside. 

As my mom, no longer married to my dad, and many of my siblings were gathered around my dad’s emergency room bedside until they moved him to the morgue in the basement of the hospital, it was decided that we would all go back to his tiny apartment and move his minimalistic belongings from his place to one of my sibling’s place who lived nearby. The question was asked if anyone had a truck. Though a very surreal moment that my dad had in fact passed away, it was a tender mercy, with our car inoperable, my husband and I had come up in the truck. 

When our car randomly stopped working, I had no idea that two days later my dad would unexpectedly pass away and that being in the truck would be a tender mercy. In addition, my receiving the message and being with and conversing with my dad the night before he passed was a blessed tender mercy! 

As the weekend unfolded, I had come to know the why, the why my reliable car, without warning, had faltered a couple of days prior. 

When have you come to know the why something undesirable happened “for you”, which, the occurrence, in and of itself, was a provided tender mercy?

tendermercym❤️ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

*If you would like to receive an email when new posts are published which includes an audio version of the posts as well, please send your name and email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com.

Why Did That Have To Happen?

An unfortunate occurrence caused me to wonder, “why did that have to happen?”

During a cross country road trip as our family was traveling in two different vehicles, my husband and one of our children in the lead vehicle and I and our puppy behind them, an unfortunate occurrence caused me to wonder, “why did that have to happen?”

Approximately three hours into the first day of our three-day journey, as the skies darkened, loose gravel rocks kicked up by a passing diesel pummeled the top of our car. Per the sound that incurred as a result, I thought the upper half of our car top carrier had separated and flown off. I envisioned our luggage wind lifted out every which way from the car top carrier and randomly scattered along the roadway behind us. 

As I slid back our moonroof headliner for a quick glance upward to assess the condition of the car top carrier, it became apparent, as I observed the shattered center of our moonroof, that a gravel rock had ricocheted from our car top carrier down into the moonroof.  

Upon immediately closing the headliner to prevent any shards and broken glass from falling into the interior of the car, a rattling noise ensued. Concerned and not knowing in the darkness the condition of the car top carrier, I pulled over. Initially, my attempts to reach out and alert my husband up ahead of my situation failed due to no cell service. Fortunately, aside from the shattered moonroof, the car top carrier was intact. 

Once back on the road, as the unsettling rattling noise grew louder, I continued to try to get ahold of my husband, now a distance up ahead of us. It was a tender mercy that a couple miles up the road, the lack of cell service was short lived and as he found a place to pull over, I stopped with him. 

It was a tender mercy that at the time the moonroof shattered, we were long past a grim and heavy downpour we had driven through shortly after our journey began, which driving visibility was very limited and the window wipers could barely keep up. Once out of the storm pocket, though the sky was clear and the stars were out, a beautiful temperate summer night to open up the moonroof, it was a tender mercy the moonroof and the headliner were not opened for our puppy would have been in harm’s way as she had been lying on the middle console directly below where the moonroof shattered.

With a couple hours remaining till we reached our rest accommodations for the night, it was a tender mercy dry conditions remained. In addition, though I could not change what had happened and I did not want to dwell in the past, rather focus on what to do now—given pause and reflection if another diesel drove by me, would it be best to drop my speed to keep a distance between us with a hope to not get pummeled again with loose gravel and a thought of possibly placing a tarp or plastic bags taped atop the moonroof, along the two hour stretch, briefly here and there I asked the question, “why did that have to happen?”

As we arrived a late hour at a well lit gas station near our first night’s stay location, it was tender mercy I was inspired to ask my husband to check if the service station sold duct tape. They did. The inspired solution was a super great sealant and waterproof protectant that held up through the night. 

The next day, our journey onward started off smooth. As highway speeds increased, the duct tape over the shattered area of the moonroof caved inward and separated an area of the overlapping tape. The air gap altered the aerodynamics of the wind flow and created the return of the unrelenting rattling sound, an awful turbulent shaking noise. 

It was a tender mercy that not only was there a Supercenter not far ahead along the road we were traveling, but also that my husband received additional inspiration on how and what to do to temporarily remedy our faced situation. He was inspired to place several empty 16.9 oz. plastic water bottles between the headliner and the duct taped shattered moonroof and two plastic bin lids side by side atop the moonroof taped down with duct tape.

Problem solved. The unrelenting rattling noise ceased. The waterproof covering held up the remainder of our trip and weeks beyond, even during a couple of thunderstorms prior to the arrival and installation of our new moonroof. 

To my ask, why did that have to happen? Why did we have to experience that fluke shattered moonroof incident? Though I don’t know the reason why or if there was any reason, it was a tender mercy our puppy and myself were protected and my husband and I were inspired immediately with problem solving solutions for a temporary means to keep the shattered moonroof covered till it could be replaced.  

When have you had an unfortunate and unknown, “why did that have to happen?” incident occur to your car while on a road trip and you received inspiration on how and what to do until it could get fixed?

tendermercym❤️ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

*If you would like to receive an email when new posts are published which includes an audio version of the posts as well, please send your name and email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com.

What To Do? What To Do?

What To Do? What To Do? Each evening, we have enjoyed well spent, quality hours of fun together eating a Christmas treat and playing a game.

What To Do? What To Do?

As my children are getting older, I still want Christmas to be a magical time of year. I LOVE Christmas. It is magical for me and I don’t ever want that to go away. With the Christmas season upon us, I so wanted to come up with activities our two kids still at home would enjoy doing all together as a family during the days leading up to Christmas day. The question was “What To Do? What To Do?” I spent a lot of time thinking about what to do without any answer coming to me, until the answer came through a series of events and then I could barely contain my excitement and giddiness to share the idea, first with my husband and then our kids. 

A couple of days prior to the first of December while on a drive with one of my children, I asked them about our Christmas traditions and which ones they liked and would like to continue to carry on this upcoming Christmas season. As I went down the list, the activities our family has done in year’s past did not so much interest them any longer, except for one, ice skating. Desiring to come up with more than just that one activity our children, who are not so little anymore and will be leaving home all too soon, would enjoy was a challenge. 

During our dialogue, it was a tender mercy I was prompted to ask them if they like games to which they said yes in a casual kind of way and it was expressed again what they, as of late, had brought up several times before of a game we did not have that they were interested in playing. Traditionally, every year for Christmas our family has unwrapped a new game. Of the number of games we have, most have only been played once or not at all as we gravitate to our favorite top go-to games—Ticket To Ride, Settlers of Catan, Boggle, Apples To Apples, Rook, and Phase 10. 

Though following our conversation I was still unsure what to do that would engage our children to enjoy the spirit of the holiday all season long up through Christmas day and my prayers to know what to do continued, the prompting kickstarted what became a fully formed idea that began on December 1. 

On this mid morning Tuesday, it was a tender mercy I felt impressed to reopen an email I had received from our women’s Relief Society organization at church about an upcoming homeless care kit collection service activity. Even though I would be unable to attend the activity, I wanted to help out. Upon my also going to our Relief Society Facebook page to see if there was a list of what was needed to then gather what items our family had on hand to donate to the cause and deliver them to the Relief Society President that afternoon, the first thing I saw as I opened up Facebook was a friend share on their Facebook stories the #LightTheWorld calendar. Not realizing as the day began that it was December 1st nor was I at all aware the #LightTheWorld countdown would be happening again this year, grateful to not miss the opportunity to start with day 1, it was a tender mercy I saw the post when I did and the first day of the countdown was about donating to a charity to which it so happened I was in the process of doing.  

From there, it was a tender mercy I was prompted to open up another email from our ward Bishop regarding an Angel Tree to which I wanted to help out in that way as well. As I began taking an inventory of what gifts for what ages I already had on hand from purchases I have made over the years and saved specifically to give for birthdays and Christmas, I discovered an unexpired sealed box of cordial cherry chocolates from last Christmas.  

While in route the few minutes away from my place to drop off the items for the homeless service project with plans of returning home right after, it was a tender mercy that per the series of events above, a spontaneous, on the spot, impression as to what activity to do that would suit our family well dawned on me. It was to do a 25 day Christmas countdown in which each day one family member would secretly wrap a Christmas treat of their choosing and a second family member would likewise secretly wrap a game of their choosing from our current selection of games or the purchase of a new game and then a third family member would unwrap the treat and the fourth family member would unwrap the game and we would spend the evening eating the treat and playing the game. Every day after, up through Christmas day, we would rotate who did what. I was super ecstatic about this splendid idea and could not wait to share it with our family. 

After delivering the items, I straightaway drove to a store nearest me to purchase the very game my child had most recently, here and there, requested. Originally, I was going to drive to a store further away because it was where I had seen the game days earlier, yet it was a tender mercy that I felt impressed to go to the store just up the street from me and being that they too had the game, I saved a lot of time not sitting in rush hour traffic and money for gas had I traveled 4x the distance to the other store.  

Once home, I couldn’t wait to gather our family together to share the idea with them. With giddiness and enthusiasm, I began by asking them what day it was. One of our children responded with December 1. They then asked if we were doing the #LightTheWorld countdown. It was remarkable this child remembered it from the Christmas past and I happily shared that we, without initially being aware, participated in Day 1 and then I proceeded to excitedly present the activity idea that had come to me. 

It was a tender mercy that everyone was on board and where I had hoped that one day we would take the time to play our other games, now was that opportunity. Also, it was a tender mercy that the 25 day countdown idea came on December 1. As we began the countdown that evening, the child wanting the new game was pleased when they opened up the first wrapped gift to see the game of their choosing and that it would be the first one we played, and our other child opened up the wrapped cordial cherry chocolates.

It has been an incredible Christmas season thus far. Our 25 day Christmas countdown has been a daily event everyone has looked forward to with joy. When I asked my children, “If we didn’t have any gifts on Christmas day and this is all we did, would they be ok with that?” They said yes. Each evening, we have enjoyed well spent, quality hours of fun together eating a Christmas treat and playing a game. 

When has an answer to a prayer in which you desired to know “What to do? What to do?” come by way of a series of events? 

tendermercym❤️ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

*If you would like to receive an email when new posts are published which includes an audio version of the posts as well, please send your name and email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com.

How Did That Happen?

After decades of having a fear of dogs and declining my kids request for one year after year, our family now has a puppy. How did that happen?

What do you know! After decades of having a fear of dogs and declining my kids request for one year after year, our family now has a puppy. How did that happen?

As a youth, I was nipped from behind by an angry unrestrained dog as I was walking home one day. After that occurrence, I’ve pretty much stayed clear of dogs and avoided petting them. Though I have enjoyed observing them from a distance, I have not wanted them close by me. 

When our kids repeatedly asked for a dog each Christmas, I was giddy when I would come across a creative dog gift I could give them in place of a real dog. The most memorable gift was the “fur real dog” and an awesome dog book that was so relatable and spot on to the desires of our children and the concerns of mine. Another memorable gift came from our children to my husband and I, and it is one I use often. It is a cute dog print plush fabric they purchased and sewed around the edges and made it into a blanket. 

Though fear was the primary reason for my not wanting to get a dog, over the years I would also share with my kids the secondary reasons for my not wanting a dog such as their odor, chewing at furniture and stair railings, cleaning up vomit, poop and urine in the house and vomit and poop outside in the yard, veterinary appointments, the expense of boarding while traveling, etc. 

A couple of months ago, prior to visiting a loved one with a puppy, our children once again asked if we could get a puppy. I said that if I did well around the loved one’s puppy then I would be ok looking into our getting one when we got back home.  What? How Did That Happen? How did I go from not wanting a dog to now being okay with one? I don’t know, other than the timing felt right. 

Surprisingly, I did really well being around the puppy and I did not experience any fear at all. As such, upon our return home, my kids and husband began researching about different dogs. It was a tender mercy we all agreed on and liked the same kind of dog, a labradoodle. 

Once we decided on the breed of dog, our children then made a list of all the labradoodle breeders within a 4 1/2 hour radius of us. It was a tender mercy that though most of the breeders on the list did not have any puppies available, the second breeder on the list referred us to one of their breeder friends, not on our list and located less than an hour from our place, who had one puppy pick available in their litter of seven after a recent buyer cancelled and the puppies were exactly what we were looking for in size, color, and generation of breed. As labradoodle puppies are in high demand in our area, the timing of our contacting the breeder was a tender mercy as they had not yet updated their website to indicate the availability status for the last puppy and we were able to secure placement for the last pick.  

In my initial dialogue with the breeder, I expressed my fear of dogs as well as my excitement to have a puppy and that what was most important to me was that the puppy got along with every family member, especially me considering my longtime fear of dogs. Though there was no guarantee if the last puppy would be the best fit for our family, it was a tender mercy that all of the puppies in the litter were cute and based on that alone, we would have been pleased with any one of them, though their was one in particular we wanted the most. Fortunately, it was a tender mercy that the last puppy left was the very one we had wanted and the one the breeder felt would be a perfect fit for our family. And that she is. She is sweet, has a calm temperament,  and interacts so good with each of us. 

Upon bringing her home, it was a tender mercy that as she sat on a blanket in the car between our two youngest teenage children, throughout the two hour car ride that included a few stops along the way for my husband and I to purchase puppy supplies we did not want to get before we were sure we were bringing a puppy home, she did not have any accidents in the car or need to stop to go potty before we got home. 

Caring for a puppy has been quite exhausting, particularly puppy potty training and maintaining a vigilant eye on her all throughout the day. It has been a huge tender mercy that around the clock she has had a family member able to care for her as everyone has been home full time from my husband working remotely and our children doing virtual learning due to the continued COVID-19 pandemic precautionary measures in place.

It has also been a tender mercy that an opportunity to facilitate an Emotional Resilience class has coincided with the timing of when we picked her up from the breeder as there have been many doozy of days while potty training her and not being able to get ahead of her messes for which I have been able to utilize, apply, and implement the skills and tools I am learning each week in the class to not give in to believing that I am not cut out to be a puppy owner. 

Another tender mercy has been that I have not needed to take on the nerve-racking attempt to clip and file her sharp nails that grow out quickly as she files her front paw nails all on her own via our stone fireplace. 

Additionally, within the first week and a half of having her home, she has visited the veterinary clinic twice, once for her initial puppy exam and the other time for an ear checkup when she started whimpering upon her ears being touched and I noticed redness on the cartilage side of one of her ears. 

Due to the timing of both appointments, I took her by myself as no one else was available to go with me. Being alone with a dog would have before now made me extremely nervous and I would not have been able to do it, however, I was not afraid. How did that happen? How did I go from not wanting a dog near me to now having a dog in my lap and holding and stroking her fluffy hair? It was a tender mercy that as I visualized and imagined the joy of having a puppy, I was able to love on her and not panic or feel fear. 

Also, being a first time dog owner and not knowing what I was doing or how to do certain things related to her care, it was a tender mercy the veterinary doctor offered to show me how to give her a tablet for ticks and fleas and to put medicine in her ear for a mild yeast infection. Watching the veterinary doctor do it was a tender mercy as I am a visual learner and seeing it done gave me a little more confidence that I could do it on my own.

When have you gone from absolutely never wanting to have something, for whatever reason, to overnight being completely ok with having it and wondering, “how did that happen?”

tendermercym❤️ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

*If you would like to receive an email when new posts are published which includes an audio version of the posts as well, please send your name and email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com.

More Deliberate Quality Time With One Another

An opportunity as a family to spend more deliberate quality time with one another came when we temporarily stepped away from our screens to observe the Air Force Thunderbirds as they flew by our area.

Over the course of two months since the Covid-19 quarantine, being home together as a family has been wonderful. However, even though we have all been together during this time, much of our weekday hours in close proximity to each other has been spent separately engaged with school assignments via distance learning, employment from our home office, and various hobbies, mostly by means of screen time. As such, when an opportunity early afternoon came up to spend more deliberate quality time with one another away from our screens, I embraced and relished the moment.   

A couple of days prior, I heard that the Air Force Thunderbirds would be flying overhead near our area, at a specific time, on this day, to recognize and pay tribute to our front line responders, healthcare and essential workers for all that they have done during the coronavirus pandemic. Thirty minutes before the scheduled fly by, our family stopped temporarily what we were individually involved in doing to go see them. We anticipated the time away from home would be very short. However, it was not until the very minute we expected to see the F-16 Fighting Falcons fly by did we learn that due to inclement weather the time of the Thunderbirds arrival had been delayed 1 hour. 

Upon getting this updated news, we all decided it did not make sense to drive back home 15-20 minutes away to shortly thereafter turn around and return back to the place we considered an ideal location to see the Thunderbirds fly by, per their flight pattern, and instead, we agreed to pass the time by getting lunch together. Even though the mandate to wear a mask inside public places is an easy deterrent for me to have not wanted to go inside an establishment to pick up food, the availability to do so was a tender mercy as we were able to spend more deliberate quality time with one another and break away from screen time for a bit longer.

In addition, when we returned back to our original location and were only able to see a brief glimpse of the Thunderbirds as they flew by, it was a tender mercy we were able to get to another lookout spot within their flight pattern just in time to observe a spectacular 180 view of them before they looped away, and being that the location was a greater distance from our home, we had even more deliberate quality time with one another to which I embraced and relished. 

When have you relished moments in which an event you were attending with loved ones was delayed and the opportunity to spend more deliberate quality time with one another came as a result?

tendermercym❤️ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

*If you would like to receive an email when new posts are published which includes an audio version of the post as well, please send your name and email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com.

Freedoms In The Midst Of Restrictions

Despite orders on a state and national level precluding certain activities from taking place for the time being due to the coronavirus pandemic, there have been many freedoms in the midst of restrictions to which I have enjoyed and valued very much.

For years, I have heeded the spiritual counsel given by modern-day prophets to prepare, alongside with my husband, for any number of potential catastrophic circumstances or devastating situations that may come our way. As such, although schools, churches, parks, and businesses have most recently closed temporarily due to the coronavirus pandemic, I have not felt any anxiety, stress, panic or fear. I have felt at ease. Despite orders on a state and national level precluding certain activities from taking place for the time being, there have been many freedoms in the midst of restrictions to which I have enjoyed and valued very much.   

~It has been a tender mercy that although state and local parks have closed, the nature preserve directly behind our house has been open, where our family has spent time outdoors many of days riding numerous bike trails and leisurely enjoying the walking paths, there and in our neighborhood as the spring temperatures and weather this year have both been ideal and beautiful. 

~Even with church buildings closed, it has been a tender mercy we have been able to continue to worship and have a Sacrament meeting in our home as a family each Sabbath Day.  

~In the wake of many products for weeks being hard to get because of the insufficient supply ratio to the sudden overwhelming demand for them, it has been a tender mercy that all of our essential needs have thus far been adequate due to our efforts to have consistently prepared ongoing for times like now long before the outbreak of the coronavirus.

~Before the stay-at-home order, when I frequented stores on a regular basis as I prefer in-store shopping, I would make frivolous and unnecessary purchases here and there to which the minimal costs for each item pulled together would add up quickly. For me, the money I have saved with “nonessential” businesses currently closed has been a tender mercy. 

~On days preceding the stay-at-home order when family members went off to school and work and the house was very quiet, I wanted to be out and about constantly. With our home now filled with family togetherness 24/7, it has been a tender mercy I have surprisingly not become stir crazy and had the itch to get out of the house. 

~Also, during this timeframe of enclosure, I’ve learned I am more so an introvert than I had ever thought myself of being and it is a tender mercy how content I have been days on end without being phased and feeling any disruption to my core being.

~In addition, it has been a tender mercy that for the first time ever I have not been constantly on the go. The stay-at-home order has opened up a lot of time for me to relax and enjoy so many of my at-home hobbies and the treasured opportunity to spend priceless quality time together as a family.  

When have you treasured the many freedoms in the midst of restrictions that were present for you during times like these? And, what have been those freedoms in the midst of restrictions that you have valued during these times?

tendermercym❤️ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

*If you would like to receive an email when new posts are published, please send your name and email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com.

Back Up Again After The Fall

Even after slipping and falling while mountain biking, I was determined and set to get back up again after the fall and finish the course.

While participating in an outdoor adventure with my husband and children, one that I had never before done, I was a bit nervous from the start to the finish of our mountain biking experience, but I did not let it show. At one point along the way, as I made a jagged turn, slipped, and was unable to regain my footing before landing, I was determined and set on getting back up again after the fall and finishing the run. 

A couple weeks prior, as Spring Break was approaching, our family came together to discuss and plan out what we wanted to do during that time. It was decided that we would each select one specific activity of our choosing that we would then all do together. Among the activities was an indoor waterpark, outdoor ropes course and zip line, escape room, drive-in-movie, and mountain biking.

I enjoy biking, leisure biking that is. However, mountain biking is a different kind of terrain for me to which I was partly apprehensive, but willing to give it a try. As I love being in nature, I figured if I kept my mind focused on that aspect and that alone, I would do just fine. It would not only offset my anxiety of riding an open chairlift to the top of the mountain, but also offset my anxiety while biking down a narrow, rocky trail with threatening edges and intense switchbacks along with other bikers, who by far were faster, more experienced and gutsy than myself.

While ascending uphill the first time around, I was unaware that there was a safety bar attached to the chairlift. It was a tender mercy when almost 3/4 of the way up, one of my children in a chairlift ahead of me noticed that I was riding unrestrained and made it known to me that there was a safety bar I could pull down in front of me. After I gently brought it down, I felt more secure and at greater ease while being high above the ground. 

Once at the top of the mountain, of all the runs, I opted to time and again go down the singular green course that was marked as the easiest of them all. The first time downhill was a dry run. I was pleased that though it was a challenging course, for a beginner like me, it was doable. The second time downhill was my favorite. I was comfortable, felt relaxed and really enjoyed the ride. On my third time downhill, I missed staying up high along a berm going around a bend and turned too sharply into loose dirt within the mid and lower portion of the switchback. Being unable to steady myself, I slipped and fell.

Although I tried resisting the fall, my feet and bike had no traction. I was sliding sideways into base so to speak. Once I came to a solid stop, as I lifted myself back up on my feet and brushed off my pant legs, I could feel my right elbow, right knee, and the inner portion of my left foot start to sting. 

Considering that I was wearing fitted pants and a fitted jacket, I felt it best to keep the sustained injuries covered and not expose the open sores to dirt and debris until I could properly care for them. It was not until we returned home that I observed the extent of my injuries. It was a tender mercy that though my leg was scuffed up just below my right knee, there was no bleeding, only the appearance of broken blood vessels and a visible, yet painless bruise, my right elbow had no scraps or marks whatsoever only a slightly tender internal bruise, and my inner left foot had nothing more than a tiny nick. It was a tender mercy that my having worn long pants and a long sleeve jacket not only served as a covering from exposure to the elements, but also as a protection from being more so injured.

Despite the fall, once I got back up, I was determined to finish the course and I was set on being able to round that same bend over and over again undeterred. It was a tender mercy I did not get stuck in a mental block and I was able to continue mountain biking the remainder of our four hour time at the bike park without again slipping and falling.

Even though the luster of riding casually and blissfully down the nature trail was somewhat lost after I fell and I became more cautious and deliberate as I maneuvered down the course, at times skimming one foot a top the ground as I came around the switchbacks to stay upright and not lose my balance, I strived to simultaneously soak up and take in as much as I could of the beauty around me.

When have you been somewhat nervous about trying something adventurous for the first time and though you fell down and got a little scraped up, you got back up again after a fall and finished the course multiple times over?

tendermercym❤️ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

*If you would like to receive an email when new posts are published, please send your name and email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com.

Missed An Important Deadline

Upon missing an important deadline to register for an event, fortunately, the registration was still open for a late fee.

Typically I would be bummed if I missed an important deadline, however, recently when I did just that, missed an important deadline, I was not bothered. 

For months now, occasionally here and there, I have mentioned to our family about an opportunity taking place during a general timeframe for a couple of family members to participate in an event that is held multiple times during the year. However, a strong interest had not been expressed fully by them, therefore, I felt no urgency or pressure to look into registering them for it. Ironically, the day I felt impressed to look into the details of when the closest upcoming one would take place and the timing of when to register, the deadline had just ended the day prior. 

Considering that I would normally be bummed and disappointed if I had missed an important deadline, it was quite uncharacteristic of me to have felt so at ease and not bothered at all about missing the registration deadline. As the family members had not been set on any one of the available dates in particular, per se, I was not stressed or anxious in the least. Though, as I casually shared with one of them that the general timeframe I had brought up from time to time, now only a little more than a month away, was at this point completely out of the question, they were surprised that I had not looked into registering them sooner as I am not a usual procrastinator and often speak to giving oneself a cushion when planning things out. But, for whatever reason, I had not felt compelled or inclined to look into it any sooner than on the day that I did.

Despite the closest date being no longer a possibility, so I thought, as I continued to look into further information about the event, it was a tender mercy I saw that the window to register for the upcoming one was still open albeit a late registration fee would be added to the admission ticket. In looking at the other dates for the event happening a couple more times later on in the year, it turned out that the date to which I just missed the registration deadline by less than 24 hours was the most ideal date of them all. Oddly, as cost-conscious as I am, I was okay and comfortable with paying the late fee.

When have you missed an important deadline to register for an event and then learned that the registration was still open for a late fee to which you were willing to pay?

tendermercym❤️ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

*If you would like to receive an email when new posts are published, please send your name and email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com.

I Failed To Follow The Effective Advice

I failed to follow effective advice and when I did, messages on Dove chocolate wrappers remind me to give myself grace.

Earlier in the day I was inspired by a video message I listened to about mourning with those that mourn, however, several hours later when an opportunity came up to be a “doer of the word, not just a hearer only”, I failed to follow the effective advice.

As I called a loved one, I recognized right away they were down and said, “it sounds like you are down”, to which they replied that they were and they then preceded to share with me the why. I initially listened and validated the struggle they were going through and then I moved into the natural tendency of offering suggestions by way of relating other’s experiences in situations similar and providing educational information. Not long after, the call ended abruptly to which I sensed right then that what I had shared had not been comforting or helpful at all. 

I reflected immediately on my error of not fully mourning with them. It was a tender mercy I was able to give myself grace and not go into a hole myself for messing up and failing to follow the effective advice I had just heard hours prior. 

I trusted Christ would go before me and after me (Doctrine and Covenants 84:88) and make up the difference where I lacked offering adequate and effective compassion and empathy. And, I prayed for my loved one that my lack of providing what they needed would not cause them to go into a deeper funk. 

I then felt impressed to send them the below text message as I did not want to leave them in the dark, feeling all alone, but rather provide them hope by acknowledging and apologizing for my lack of adequately mourning with them, expressing empathy, and extending, through words, my love, care, and concern for them.  

“I am sorry! I recognize now my call was not beneficial and uplifting at all and I apologize for that. Though I meant well, it is not what you needed and I am so sorry! I am sorry for the lack of comfort I sensed you felt when you did not want to continue the call as a result of what I shared to which, in hindsight, I realize was unhelpful. I am very sorry! I am sorry you are dealing with all that you are going through and the lack of help you are receiving! Sending hugs 🤗 and love ❤️.”

When have you realized in hindsight that you were not present for someone in the way they needed help and support and as you failed to follow effective advice such as mourn with those who mourn, you were able to give yourself grace and act on a prompting to reach out and mend your error? 

tendermercym❤️ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

*If you would like to receive an email when new posts are published, please send your name and email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com.*

The Event Didn’t Pan Out As Scheduled

This event didn’t pan out as scheduled

While quickly going into a store to pick up a handful of needed items, I noticed a bulletin showcasing that Santa would be visiting there the very next afternoon. I was sure my youngest, who loves Christmas, would be excited about attending this holiday event. I decided to wait until the day of to mention it to them and surprise them with what I thought would be a fun experience, however, the event didn’t pan out as scheduled.

Prior to becoming aware that it wouldn’t actually take place after all, when I asked my youngest if they wanted to go, they did not express any enthusiasm and were indecisive and dragging their feet. I was surprised and shocked. I thought for certain they would have wanted to go especially being that the store was just down the street, only a couple miles from our home. The close proximity and short drive away, at least for me, was exciting.

Upon asking them multiple times within the 4-hour block Santa was to be at the venue whether they were interested in going, I received the same hedging response each time. As the hours passed and I continued to prod, it was then shared with me that they only wanted to go if the whole family went, unfortunately, our family was dispersed with overlapping activities during that entire timeframe. In addition, it was expressed to me that they preferred we all go see Santa and enjoy activities together where we have traditionally gone for a number of years. 

Though I was surprised they hedged about seeing Santa at this new place, I valued their reason and their response caused me to reflect on my desires this year to enjoy the season in a lighter, more simple way, so rather than starting or adding another tradition, it was a tender mercy my youngest was not all that inclined to go. 

Also, while shopping the day prior, I was feeling under the weather and I did not remember to get one other needed item. As I returned back to the store after the event was over to purchase that item, out of curiosity, I asked an employee standing near the bulletin how the event went and I was told that for some reason Santa didn’t show up and the event didn’t pan out after all. In the end, it was again a tender mercy that my child’s hedging and dragging their feet actually saved us time and energy from getting ready to go and then standing around for a length of time anticipating Santa’s arrival that never came to be.  

When have your desires to take your family to a fun event not transpired for various reasons and in the end it turned out to be for the best as later you learned the event didn’t pan out as scheduled and take place after all?

tendermercym❤️ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

*If you would like to receive an email when new posts are published, please send your name and email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com.*