Winter Driving

Nineteen years ago, while returning home after spending time with extended family for Christmas, our small young family of three slid off the road moments after we switched drivers with me then behind the wheel. After twice maintaining control when driving on black ice, the 3d time the car spun around and slid backwards 400 feet down an interstate embankment and turned around feet before going into a forest of trees. 

Since that time, I’ve declined invitations year after year during the holidays, Thanksgiving and Christmas, to travel to visit family that live where those conditions are a real possibility. 

This year, after all that time, we ventured out driving hours during Christmas break to vacation and visit some cold and snowy places. I prepared our family and packed for the worst case scenario extreme weather conditions. Experience had taught me to be prepared. We had food, water, layers of clothing, blankets, and snow gear in the event we were caught in a blizzard or the weather delayed us for a time. I also periodically checked the weather pattern days leading up to and throughout our trip.  Any worries and concerns were lessened as I felt prepared and gained a peace through prayer.

I was extremely appreciative of the tender mercy and miracle that the scariest of moments when driving in the dark on wet, icy roads were brief and that we were able to get to and from every destination during our weeklong trip absent of severe weather. For most of our trip, the roads were dry and at times, the gusty winds and snow drifts blowing low along the highway were manageable. 

On Day 2, our schedule was delayed a couple of hours ultimately the perfect timing as we arrived in a city where it had been snowing all day, the snow let up before we got there and with the interstate having been salted, the road was clear other than side streets that were packed down with crunchy, icy snow. And, the day we began our trip back home was hours ahead of a new snow storm coming through. It was a tender mercy and miracle that we were able to enjoy our trip void of the snowstorm that preceded our arrival to one city earlier in the week and a new snowstorm in a city we were leaving at the end of the week.

My continuous prayers for our safety and good weather weeks prior to the trip and during were answered. 

When have you returned to a place of fear and as you prepared yourself and prayed that you would not experience a repeat of the traumatic event, you got through it safely with conditions of concern at a minimum? 

tendermercym❤️ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

*If you would like to receive an email when new posts are published, please send your name and email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com.*

Taking It Easy

The day after Thanksgiving, on Black Friday, we had guests come visit us. Prior to their arrival, I had ideas for festive, holiday community activities we could go and do together. As I began planning and scheduling when to go pick up Santa passes for a specific time later in the day and the arrival and departure times from one activity to the next, I started to feel stressed. And, add to that, not knowing what all they would be up to doing after traveling for several hours to come see us, I decided to not have a scheduled plan and take one moment at a time and go with the flow. Right away, I felt peace and I felt a calm. I didn’t worry about going and picking up the Santa passes or if we even went out at all.

As I changed to this casual approach, it was a tender mercy that the day and the evening went so smoothly. Because I didn’t lock myself into a timed plan and had no expectations, I felt relaxed. We enjoyed ourselves and had so much fun. There was no rush and no hurry to get from one place to the next. We focused on the immediate activity and when that was complete, we collectively decided whether we wanted to go to another activity. It just so happened that by the end of the evening, we did all of the originally planned activities I had wanted to do with them. The difference was that it was more relaxed and less stressful.

With each activity there were tender mercy moments all along the way. When we went bowling, we arrived and all the lanes were full except for two, the two that we needed for our families. We took our time and had fun.

Then we went to the next place. That’s where Santa was as well as Christmas crafts and activities. I didn’t get Santa passes beforehand so I wasn’t expecting that we would see and visit Santa and get pictures with him. As we were walking up to the location, the mother of the family that was with us mentioned wanting to get Santa pictures with her family so we went to the Santa station. Not only was there no line at the Santa station, there were passes available for both of our families 15 minutes later and we were the first in line for that time-slot. It was fantastic! In all the years that we’ve been to this place, we’ve never been able to see Santa with such ease. It was incredible!

We then headed off to dinner. We wanted to go to a place that happened to have a wait time of one hour for seating inside. That day was a warm day relative to the prior couple of weeks of cold weather. It was really really nice outside. We called ahead and asked if there was outdoor seating and they said yes. As soon as we arrived, they had a table ready for us. We went straight to the table and above us were heaters. As the sun set and it got a little cooler, not only did we have a wonderful meal, great food, live music behind us, an amazing location, beautiful scenery, we also had warmth. And, there was a play area for the younger kids to come and go throughout dinner while the older kids and adults were able to sit and talk and enjoy visiting with one another. It was awesome!

After dinner, we all decided we still wanted to go on to another activity and that was seeing Christmas lights. It was a drive-thru Christmas display and I was concerned because we were in two vehicles and their vehicle was larger than ours. I didn’t know if theirs would fit down the narrow passageway and underneath the archway of lights. I tried to call the location, but there was no answer so we took a risk and we went there anyway. When we got there, it all worked out nicely. Their vehicle wasn’t too wide or too high. It was a great way to end the day!

There were so many tender mercies throughout the day. It was great that it went so smoothly. It was a huge tender mercy that the casual approach was a less stressful and more relaxed way to spend our day together!

When have you gone from having a structured plan to going with the flow and your day went so much more smoothly; and miraculously, you accomplished all that you originally wanted to do with less stress?

tendermercym♥ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

*If you would like to receive an email when new posts are published, please send your name and email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com.*

Weathering The Storm

Recently, our family took a one-day trip, leaving early in the morning, driving several hours, to attend a registered event and we returned home the same day, late evening. While traveling bright and early, hours before the crack of dawn, we drove through a rainstorm that was going in the same direction we were headed. We left during heavy downpours that had flooded roads at low points. In the darkness of the hour, the areas on the road that were flooded were unknown until we actually drove into it, literally plowing through the water to make it out the other side without getting stuck. It was pretty scary and nerve-racking. As the driver, I was able to steady our car and maintain a forward direction without veering into a concrete wall or losing control later on the road.

Before we left, we had a family prayer together and throughout the drive, I continuously maintained a prayer in my heart. I felt a calm and peace. I knew all would be well and I was confident we would arrive to the location unharmed. The weather didn’t change, however, I was vigilant, gauging conditions, closely paying attention to what was ahead of me and my surroundings as well as watching the vehicles in front of me and around me.

While driving, I thought of the many challenges in life we experience that we have no control over and can not stop, but through prayer, we can receive help to get through the trying times. I did not feel impressed to turn around and go home avoiding driving in the rain. What I did feel and received was strength, comfort, support, and a peaceful assurance we would be ok.

Along the way, I implemented what I felt would be the best course of action to protect our family, staying in the middle lane where the road sat higher and was dryer, changing lanes to avoid and stay clear of puddles, remaining focused and alert, relying on light from other cars to see beyond my own visibility in the dark, slowing down as needed and speeding up when necessary for momentum to not get stuck. As the sky was darkened, I was grateful for the city lights, truck lights, and cars lights that assisted my ability to see large pools of water in our path.

There was rain the entire way to the event, heavy in the beginning and intermittent throughout with occasional light rain and brief moments of no rain. I was grateful when the sun rose and I could see more. I was also grateful for short periods of time when there was light to no rain when I could relax and release the tension in my shoulders and hands from overall having maintained a tight two-handed grip on the steering wheel to not lose control if we hit a bad spot.

We arrived safely as I knew we would. I was grateful for multiple tender mercies from having light along the way, moments of being able to relax, getting to the place on time, and the peaceful assurance that we would be ok while driving through the storm.

When you have experienced the storms of life that you could not control, change, or alter and with divine help you received a comfort and strength that helped you get through it with a feeling of peace and confidence?

tendermercym♥ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

**To receive an email when new posts are published, please send your name and email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com**

Past Mistakes

While at a college presentation recently, I was remembering some of my experiences that I had many years ago when I was a college student. Periodically, there is one experience that pops back up over and over, here and there, and eats at me. I made a decision that I have questioned and have wondered if I could go back, would I have done what I did differently. I don’t know? I don’t know if I did the right thing or if I did the wrong thing, but it is something that I have felt guilty about all these years since and I haven’t been able to fully put it behind me.

During the middle of the presentation, I received a message on my phone from a friend I’ve known since childhood, but had not had direct correspondence with in years. As the struggle was taking place in my mind and I glanced down to see my friend’s kind message come through, I was taken back to a specific memory I had with this friend several years back. I opened up to them about a choice I had made that I had not resolved and it had bothered me for over 20 years until I got it off my chest apologizing to my friend for my actions.

My friend warmly received me. As I finally put my wrong to rest, I felt a weight removed. Even after the wrong I had done, this friend still loved and cared about me and saw past my error and saw the person I am truly. I was not my mistake. I am a good person, imperfect, mortal, and am learning and growing like everyone else and I do mess up. In a quick, split second as I glanced at the message and in remembrance of that experience, I heard the words, “Stop being so hard on yourself”.

On my drive home, I pondered on what had just occurred as I kept questioning my long ago decision as a college student. Each time the experience had came up, I continued to feel sorrow and pain. This time was no different. I had been tucking away the pain, setting it aside, ashamed, disappointed, uncertain if I had adequately dealt with it earlier, struggled to forgive myself, and not sure what to do to rid it fully from gnawing at me.

As I reached out to Heavenly Father in prayer on my way home, I thought about my knowledge of the Atonement. I knew I couldn’t change the past, but I could learn from the past to not make the mistake again in the present or the future. I knew Heavenly Father wanted me to be happy moving forward. As I was dialoguing with Heavenly Father, the words “embrace it” came very clearly and distinctly. In that instance, I felt a peace. I sought confirmation of this response. And again, I felt peace. My pain and suffering washed away. All these years later as I have avoided the benefits my choice could have had because I questioned if my actions were right or not, I heard, “embrace it, use what you have done for your good”. In addition to feeling peace, I also felt an excitement.

I responded back, replying to Heavenly Father, “ok, I will embrace it”. I felt joy. My pain had stayed with me long enough and it was a tender mercy both messages I received, “Stop being so hard on yourself” and “Embrace it”, allowed me to release the pain I was holding on to and experience joy.

When have you hung on to a mistake you made long ago and after praying and hearing specific words given to you from a loving Heavenly Father, you were finally able to let it go?

tendermercym♥ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

Publicly Sharing A Personal Experience

As I sat down in a Fast and Testimony Sacrament Meeting held the 1st Sunday of the month in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, I was looking forward to hearing what messages and testimonies would be shared. This is one of my favorite meetings. Time and again, I walk away feeling encouraged and inspired by the personal testimonies of others.

As I was sitting in the pew with our family, I was feeling a burning inside that I needed to get up and share an experience I had a few days prior testifying to the truth that I know Heavenly Father is aware of us individually and personally and how I was guided and led to go to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saint Temple to receive an answer there, specific to what I was needing to hear related to questions and concerns happening in my world at that time.

It was scary and it took a lot of courage to act on the impression and walk up to the pulpit to share in front of a congregation of members, visitors, individuals, and families attending that day revelation I had received personally for me. I had no intention of sharing my experience with anyone and initially sat comfortably listening to the testimonies of others.

On occasion, I have felt that burning inside of me days prior to a Fast and Testimony Meeting and I have known ahead of time that Heavenly Father has wanted me to share my testimony. With a head’s up, I have been able to collect my thoughts and prepare what I am going to say and wear so I can somewhat feel ok as I am shaking and emotional in front of everyone.

On this day, that did not happen. I had no idea I would be one of the many who would have the prompting to get up and share what I had received as personal revelation for myself with everyone. I did not receive the impression until 20 minutes before the meeting ended.

As I watched the clock and listened to the testimonies of others, the minutes were passing by. My heart started beating fast. I was nervous and as I was debating whether to leave my seat, one of my kids began asking me questions breaking my concentration and I began feeling more tense. I waited and as I finally got up, I was the last person to share my testimony.

I am not one who is comfortable being in the lime light or the center of attention and here I was in front of everyone. I prayed Heavenly Father would help me along the way. There was no time to plan ahead what to say other than to speak to my experience and testify to what I knew. Following my testimony and as I departed the stand, I felt a peace. After the meeting, many approached me and expressed their gratitude for my testimony and what I had shared.

When have you received a strong impression to share a personal experience in front of a lot of people and although you were nervous, you knew the prompting came from Heavenly Father and you had faith He would help you?

tendermercym♥ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

Be Still

As our kids returned to school after summer break, I knew I would have “mom homework” the first few days. In addition to completing the necessary paperwork for each of them, I had a lot of other worries, concerns, and questions weighing on my mind. During this time, I set aside what I would normally do each day that was spiritually uplifting for me. By midweek, I felt drained. I decided it was a good idea to take a break to find and listen to an inspiring message that would give me a much needed boost.

As I scrolled through a couple weeks of inspirational messages on Hi Five Live, there was one message that stood out to me, however, I was not drawn to it. I skipped over it a number of times, yet felt I should go back and listen to it. Eventually I did. In the message, I remember nothing of what was shared other than the words, “you need to go to the temple” enter my mind. That day came and went. Then the next day came, and into the evening I was reminded that I needed to go to the temple. I made the decision and mentally prepared that night that I would go the next day.

Bright and early, following family prayer, I looked at the temple schedule on our fridge and noticed the temple was not open in the morning during the timeframe I had intended to go. I changed my plans and decided I would do family history work instead to further seek to find something about my husband’s great grandfather several grandfather’s back. I then went on my way to taking my kids to school.

As I pulled into my driveway upon returning home, I received the impression again that I needed to go to the temple. Immediately, I remembered the Bishop of our congregation of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints share a couple weeks earlier that more sessions for temple ordinance work had opened up. Right away, while still sitting in my car, I called the temple. I was not the least bit surprised that someone picked up. Although it was last minute, I was able to attend the final Endowment session of the morning. Throughout the session, I listened and waited for a powerful answer I was anticipating I’d receive from Heavenly Father. As I finished the ordinance and I sat in the Celestial room knowing I was to be in the temple, on that day, at that time, I continued to wait. As time passed and patrons began leaving, the room became quiet and still. It was through the quietness and stillness of the room that the message I needed to hear became known. It was, “Be Still”.

As I shared the details of my experience to my husband, he mentioned a phrase I’ve heard many times, “Be Still And Know That I Am God”. The words impacted me tremendously. This answer was applicable to every worry, concern, and question I had. Heavenly Father knew what I needed. I am grateful for the knowledge I have that He is aware of me and loves me and through a number of invitations, I was blessed as Heavenly Father lead and guided me to the temple, a place of peace, to hear the words, “Be Still”.

When have you been guided and led to a place where you have received an answer(s) to questions, concerns, and worries on your mind?

tendermercym♥ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

To receive an email when new posts are published, please send your email address to tendermercymoments@gmail.com

Katsudon Donburi

I served a mission for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints in Japan over 20 years ago. One of my favorite dishes was Katsudon donburi. When I returned back to the USA, there was one time in college where I found this dish on the menu at a fast food restaurant near campus. That was the last time I’ve had it until now. I have remembered it from time to time and when I’ve had a craving for it, I’ve hung on to the memory of how good it tasted.

Every week, my husband and I go out on a date night and we rotate choosing a place to eat. A couple weeks ago when we were talking about where to go, my husband mentioned a Japanese restaurant that he had gone to with coworkers. It was a bit of a drive from our place and on that day I wanted to stay closer to home so we opted to go elsewhere. Several weeks later, we decided to go to the Japanese restaurant.

I was amazed with how long it had been since we had been to a Japanese restaurant and fond memories came to mind, how the meat was prepared and brought to our table. When we arrived, the street sign said it was a Japanese Sushi and Bar. I was concerned they would have no meat. I am not a seafood nor a sushi eater, however, when we got inside, sat down, and looked over the menu, I was excited! I saw Katsudon donburi on the menu and it took me back to my mission and the memories of that delicious dish.

Although it was prepared slightly different, for the most part it was what I remembered and it tasted great. I was so happy to be able to enjoy this meal after almost 20 years. The nostalgia and reminiscing my time as a missionary for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in Japan was a reflective, peaceful, and happy moment. I am ecstatic to now know a place that I can go to enjoy this tasty dish.

And to top it off, I was given a large enough portion that I could not eat it all in one sitting and brought half of it home for leftovers to eat the next day. Yum!

When have you enjoyed, once again, a dish you have not had in a very long time?

tendermercym♥ments~jld

“How have you noticed Heavenly Father’s awareness and mindfulness of you today?”

Inspired Words

For so long it has bugged me when I hear my children speak unkindly and I feel like a broken record when I say, “If you have nothing nice to say, don’t say anything at all.” Then one day, these inspired words entered my mind and came out of my mouth, “What can you say instead, or not at all?”

I will, on occasion still say, “If you have nothing nice to say, don’t say anything at all” because the message is important, but more so, I now ask, “what can you say instead or not at all?” Often times, they’ll respond by answering “nothing at all”. Other times, if they spoke unkindly to a sibling, or to me, or my husband, they will pause and reflect on what they could have said instead, apologize, and then compliment or express words of gratitude to the one they spoke to poorly.

It has been fascinating to observe the transformation of giving them the opportunity to think about what they’re saying and doing and guiding them to positive action rather than my expressing irritation and annoyance and repeating, “if you have nothing nice to say, then say nothing at all” and it going in one ear and out the other. As I have asked a question instead of making a statement, it has been amazing the quick turnaround from harsh contentious words being spoken to gentle peaceful words coming from within themselves and spoken.

What inspirational words or phrases have entered your mind that you have shared with your children and it has made a difference in your home and how your family members speak and treat one another?

tendermercym♥ments~jld

Stand By Your Feeling

I was facing a conflict, a dilemma to what I was going to do and what decision I was going to make at an annual well exam visit for one of my children. I was sure they had swimmer’s ear, and I knew there was a possibility that immunizations were given at their age. I was not only concerned about my child’s ear discomfort, but also if getting shots now was a good thing or not. I questioned if other problems or side effects would arise and complicate things if I didn’t keep the two separate and deal with one thing at a time. There was some leverage between now and a year from now to receive the state required school vaccinations.

I did not know what I should do, so I did the only thing that I knew to do and that was to pray. As I prayed about the decision to wait, I felt a peace to not have the vaccinations done that day. I had received the answer prior to going to the appointment and was prepared if I felt pressure to have my child get them while in the office. Although it was shared that my child was of age to have them and they were available, surprisingly, the pressure I felt didn’t come from the staff or the doctor, but rather from within myself wanting to ensure I was doing the right thing for my child.

When my child learned about the vaccinations, they were concerned it would hurt. I offered them the option of doing it that day, waiting a few months, or next year and allowing them to weigh in on the decision and choose what they wanted to do. They, too, felt good about waiting. The staff respected our decision.

I am grateful for the peace and comfort I felt proceeding the visit in knowing what I needed to do and I was prepared if I was potentially “put on the spot”. A few times, I did consider and contemplate for a second if what I felt earlier had changed. It had not. I was reminded of the peace I felt to wait. I stood by the original feeling and the answer I had received after prayer and was able to remain unwavering in the conclusion to hold off for the time being.

When have you received an answer to a prayer and you were able to remain unwavering in your decision when you felt pressure or when you were “put on the spot”?

tendermercym♥ments~jld

Trash Day Reminder

At a time I was wrapped up in a crisis and uncertain to what the future holds, I also felt peace and comfort. I knew I’d face further challenges down the road, yet the particulars were unknown. Even though I was scared and that aspect brought great anxiety and concern, I was reassured through the Holy Ghost that all would be ok. As I was in constant prayer with Heavenly Father, I felt a strength in knowing I was not going through the difficulty alone. I am grateful for the growth and learning I have gained through hardships, at the same time I do not look forward to their impending approach.

This experience was happening simultaneous during an unusual week for me. Half of our family were gone with our oldest son serving a mission for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and my husband and youngest son at Scout Camp. It was different having only myself and our two middle children at home. The first day it rained hard for hours leaving the day bleak and dreary until dusk when for Family Home Evening (FHE) we went outside and played ladder ball. The second day was filled with preparing, gathering, and organizing necessary forms and information to have available and ready for the next day’s appointments. Also on this day, the three of us enjoyed a free entrée from Chick-fil-A as we dressed up looking like cows.

Although the days were hard and my disposition was solemn, I was grateful for activities we were able to do all together. I put on a smile and actively participated even though I was not at my best. It was no easy feat, but worth the effort.

And then early evening on the third day,  I felt lost contemplating the trial I was experiencing and not having clarity on what was going to happen and what I should do.  My heart was aching and my voice was cracking. Despite having faith and feeling comfort and peace, there was also a void and a sense of uneasiness to what struggles were still to come.

As I sought to find peace from the uncertainties constantly consuming my thoughts, I listened to inspiring messages on “Hi Five Live-Facebook” to ground and anchor myself to our loving Heavenly Father. I also made it a point to go outside. I appreciate nature and going for walks. As I stepped outside to be in a place where I could quietly and outwardly express my pain to Heavenly Father, I noticed right away the neighbor’s trash cans were out. In the midst of my troubles, I felt a joy and a gratitude for the reminder of the next day being trash day.  If I had not stepped outside, I don’t know that I would have remembered. I recognized quickly that this visual reminder was a tender mercy.

I know Heavenly Father was very mindful of me. Not only did he understand and know my hurt and suffering, he also knew my desire to not miss trash day. Seeing the trash cans removed me briefly away from my sadness, and I was filled with immense appreciation. Although I was struggling greatly, I am thankful I did not miss the tender mercy. I don’t know what the future holds, but I do know Heavenly Father is aware of me and something as simple as a visual reminder that the next day was trash day was a blessing to me.

When have you recognized in the midst of your trials, a tender mercy that is small and simple yet meaningful to you?

tendermercym♥ments~jld